“No.”

Avery raised her head, staring down at me. I could just about make out the concern on her face from the light streaming in through the gap in the curtains.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing. You should go back to sleep.”

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

She sat up properly, resting a hand on my chest.

“Shut me out like that. Talk to me. What’s wrong?”

I looked away. How could I tell her? She’d been burdened with enough shit for a lifetime. My mother’s death didn’t need to be added onto that list.

“Before you came into my life, I used to dream about my worst memories every fucking night. I thought they’d stopped for good, but clearly not.”

“Aiden…”

“It’s shit, princess, but I’ll deal with it.”

She shook her head.

“No, you don’t get to just say you’ll deal with it. You dealing with things by yourself doesn’t end well.”

Fuck. I was beginning to realise Avery had noticed far more about me than I ever expected her to. And she was fucking right about me not dealing with things well.

“I dreamt about her.”

“Your mother?”

“Lizzie… that’s her name. I try not to think about her even though I’m doing all of this for her.”

I sighed. One day I had to tell her, so why not now? I’d never told anyone about that day. Tina was the only one who knew because she was there after it happened. I never told her I’d watched the man slit my mother’s throat.

I had to tell someone and it should be Avery. The girl I loved more than anything.

“The night she died was the worst night of my life.”

Avery looked at me with concern but stayed silent as I explained in detail exactly what occurred. My heart broke all over again. Reliving that fucking memory always hurt. She took my hand at one point because my voice faltered on the moment I realised she was dead. When I was done, she crawled over me and settled her head on my chest, holding me tightly. I could feel her tears soaking into my skin. Fuck. She was crying for me.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered.

I wrapped my arms around her. Avery was the only anchor I had left in the world. She kept me from descending into rage, despair and not wanting to feel any longer. My girl kept me grounded.

“When I found out about your father, I thought for a long time it was him, but his voice wasn’t exactly the same. I don’t know who it was, princess. That’s the truth.”

I’d wanted it to be Mitchell so I could have the satisfaction of knowing her murderer was dead. Deep down, I knew it wasn’t and it fucking killed me.

“I thought you said you did know.”

“I wish I did. I just realised it didn’t add up with what I remember about that night.”

“When Rick took me, he told me to ask you who it was. He said that you had it wrong.”

I stiffened. She hadn’t told me that part.