Page 60 of Revenge (Corrupt Empire 3)

“I don’t know how you deal with it.”

How I dealt with having killed people? There wasn’t a simple answer to that. I never started out wanting to end anyone’s life. In many ways, it was revenge and a skewed sense of justice which drove me. Not to say it didn’t weigh on me. I didn’t enjoy killing. It wasn’t some kind of sport to me. The only real satisfaction it gave me was knowing they couldn’t hurt anyone any more.

“I don’t have an easy answer for you. I never wanted it to be on your conscience. Your reaction is perfectly normal. You should feel remorse, normal people do. I’m not normal nor do I pretend to be. You don’t want to be like this, trust me.”

“I thought if I could stop feeling it would make it easier, but it’s worse. I keep remembering his face and all the blood.”

She raised her head from my shoulder and looked at me.

“No more bloodshed. I can’t face it. No more death. I want them destroyed but not like this.”

I cupped her cheek. She looked so lost and alone.

“Okay. We’ll find another way.”

After everything she’d been through, I couldn’t say no. I was tired of it all too. We had to end it so we could live a normal life together. So I could care for her for the rest of our days. Avery might never get over killing Tristan, but I’d be there for her all the same.

“Are you sure? I understand why you want them gone. I really do, but more death isn’t the answer. No matter what we do, it won’t bring anyone back. Haven’t we had enough pain, Aiden? Haven’t we suffered enough? Haven’t you?”

Her words dropkicked me right in the chest. She was right. I had. And now, so had she.

I stroked her cheek.

“I’m sure, but I’m not going to make you any promises because we can’t predict what will happen. That night is proof we can’t account for everything.”

She reached up, placing a hand on mine.

“I know. Thank you for understanding.”

I stared into her eyes, hoping this meant she was back, but nervous she wasn’t all the same.

“You’re not going to disappear on me again, princess?” I whispered.

She shook her head.

“I don’t want to live like that. I’m trying… for you… for us. It hurts. It’s like there’s a black mark on my soul and I can’t rub it off. I don’t know if this guilt will ever go away. I’m so sorry I dropped out on you. I didn’t know how to handle what happened. I didn’t know what to think, say or do. It’s like a part of me died that night. I feel so broken, Aiden. I don’t know how to fix it. I don’t know how to make it better. My soul is crying out for something and I don’t know what.”

She clutched my hand on her face.

“Please help me. I don’t want to feel like this. I shouldn’t have shut you out. You’re the only one who understands. You know me better than I know myself. You know what I need.”

I leant forward, capturing her mouth in mine. I understood her. She needed me. That’s what her soul was calling out for. Me. I could feel it. I took her pain away. I always had. Even if I didn’t want her to be reliant on me in the way she had been when we first met, I had to give her what she needed. I’d build her back up to the girl she’d been before this all happened. The one who possessed an inner strength unlike any other girl I’d met.

She sighed into my mouth, pressing closer. I dropped my hand from her face to her throat, holding her in place with a loose grip. Pulling away, I pressed kisses to her jaw until I met her ear.

“I’m going to give you exactly what you need,” I told her in a low voice. “What you’ve always needed. You want my control, don’t you, princess? You want me to take away all your choices. You want to submit. Give me everything. Every part of you. Even the darkest parts of your soul are mine.”

I bit down on her earlobe, eliciting a mewl from her lips.

“Yes, please. I’m yours. I’m all yours.”

I almost groaned in anticipation of being inside her. Her submission was everything to me. To us. The desire to have her at my mercy never really went away. It pulsed in my veins. She might be my wife now, but I still needed this side of our relationship. I always would.

“I want you on your knees on the bed. You won’t be able to run. So tell me now if you want to stop.”

“Please, Aiden. Please, I want you. I need you.”

“On the bed then.”

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