Page 133 of Trade of a Lifetime (Trade Wind 1)

“No, no,” he spoke through his fingers. “But for every forward jolt of the carriage, it feels as though it’s spinning round and round.”

Clara bit her lip, hating herself for taking advantage of her brother’s weakened state. Worse, it was more than distasteful to trade on the Siderises’ family suffering.

My cause is just, she reasoned.

“I have something to say, David, about marriage. Nicholas is not the match for me. I accept that. But you were right—it’s time for me to marry.”

If not for the seriousness of the stakes, Clara would have laughed at her brother’s comically horrified expression as he gazed at her from behind his spread fingers. Whatever Greek spirit he’d imbibed loosened his control.

“How can you say such a thing? After tonight? Just look at Adrian!”

“I don’t envy him his suffering. But we must take risks, as you’ve said yourself. Why, don’t you recall when I asked about acquiring Rosemount? It’s a huge undertaking, and you lectured me on the necessity of risk.”

“That’s trade, Clara! Pounds I can always earn again. I have but one heart, and it’s been damaged enough. It’s indelicate to say, but I saw your suffering over our parents and Violet, and that’s enough for a lifetime.”

“Isn’t that for me to determine? To know what I wish to venture, for what reward?”

“Clara, do you remember how heartbroken you were when your Chaucer succumbed after being attacked by another hound?”

She blinked, taken aback by the memory. She’d been ten or so and devastated when he died. “Of course. But what…”

“If our parents had allowed it, you’d have filled the house with dogs, every litter born on the estate. You’d have died a thousand deaths instead of one, none hurting less than the other nine-hundred-and-ninety-nine. However indulgent our parents were, even they knew to protect you from that. From yourself.”

She gasped, sitting up straighter. “I beg your pardon! You’re comparing wanting a family with a litter of pups? And equating protecting me as a child with protecting me now?”

“Are you any less vulnerable in heart now than then? What manner of brother would I be if I didn’t protect you from all harm, including of your own doing?”

“David, by your account, marrying is like stepping in front of a speeding carriage! It’s not! In fact,weare the outliers, David, innothaving married! Everyone else has.”

“We’re odd ones, Clara, and that’s just it, isn’t it? We’ve chosen our lot. If you were an ordinary sister and you wanted to marry, perhaps I’d be more amenable. You begged off from continuing your first season, and I understood. You revealed what you’ve been doing with the LLS, and I understood.”

“Then perhaps you can understand this other? That I may wish to marry after all? Not justanyone,but someone who’s likeyou.Who in his own right accepts that I’m not eighteen. Accepts the LLS.”

“By God, Clara!Whodo you think that would be?”

She wrapped her arms around herself, hurt by his words and his bewildered tone. “Is it so unimaginable?”

“Yes! Yes, it is. I’d started to wonder if Irons could work, what with the women in that family. Sirena has paint under her nails half the time, and Pen solves equations twice as fast as I. He’s fond of you, but I’m afraid that the mere fact that his father suggested it means he won’t ever consider it. I shouldn’t have been so daft.”

“Is it daft to think that someone other than Irons could wish to marry me?”

“Marrying you isn’t the problem, Clara! It’s living with you after!”

She gasped.

“Infernal drink!” David balled his fists. “That’s not what I meant, Clara! Youknowwhat I mean.”

“Oh? What?”

“Lord Chavet is looking to marry again. Lost a second wife to childbed fever, and needs a mother for his children. What do they number now? Six? Seven? Under the circumstances, I daresay he’d consider a wife of five-and-twenty this time. But accept your Violet House activities?”

“No,” she choked out.

“Who might, do you think? There’s the indebted wastrel, the duke’s brother. What’s his name? Fremont. For the right price, he’d likely not only accept the LLS but ask for its direction, that he may pay your tenants a visit!”

“David!”

“Forgive my crudeness. I don’t wish to hurt you, which is why I would save you from this nonsense. We don’t need it. And anyone who needs you enough to take the LLS with you? He’s surely someone who doesn’t deserve you.”

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