Page 74 of Jagged Line Paradise

I cry because the truth is so painful.

I cry because the truth changes nothing.

I cry because he’s silent.

His hand falls away from his mouth. “Lonnie.” He’s quiet for another beat. “I’ve neverstoppedloving you.”

He falls forward, catching me in a kiss that steals my breath. His arms slip around behind my back and he turns us onto our sides. I wrap my leg over his hip, my arms around his back, and hold him close. His words pour into my mouth with his kiss, feeding me his sincerity. The kiss goes on forever, never-ending, because this…this feeling, this holding, this loving…this is paradise.

I fell asleep sometime after the third orgasm, beyond exhausted from the day’s events. It’s still dark when I open my eyes and I roll over to look at the digital clock on the bedside table. I figure it must be time to get up—I slept like a rock. It was probably the best night’s sleep I ever had. I blink at the red numbers on the screen because they tell me it’s 2:37 a.m..

How is that even possible?

I roll back over, happy there are more hours of sleep ahead in this soft, beautiful bed, and that’s when I notice Andrés isn’t there. I sit up and glance around the room, but of course, it’s too dark to see anything with all the lights out. But I do hear the shower water running.

Why is he showering inthe middle of the night?

I twist a strand of hair around my finger. I should just lay down and go back to sleep. But the thought of him in the shower draws unapologetic need to my core. Before I even think it through, I toss the covers off of my naked body and climb out of bed. I pad softly across the carpet and slowly push on the handle of the bathroom door, creeping it open slowly.

I squint against the bright, fluorescent lights as I creep into the largest bathroom I’ve ever seen. Double sinks to my right, toilet to my left with a half-wall built up on the side of it—for extra privacy, I guess.

There’s a gap between the half-wall and the wall across from it, which bends into a corner to create an opening at the end. The shower is hidden around that corner, a large, dark walk-in that you wouldn’t even know is there if you weren’t looking for it.

In fact, Andrés doesn’t even know I’m there as I round that corner and immediately come to a stop. My breath catches in my lungs as I take in the sight of him with his back turned to me.

Have I really been sodistracted in our love-making that I didn’t seeit before?

There’s a large, black tattoo across the entirety of his chiseled back. It looks like angel wings, though the wing on the right has wilted feathers that twist and melt, as if they’re dripping down his back. The other wing is intact—perfect, beautiful, intricate details that add dimension and make it look almost as if you could feel it.

I’m drawn to it, drawn to him.

I approach slowly, intent on running my hands over the artwork, when suddenly I realize his hand is around his cock. He strokes himself beneath the flow of the water, one arm braced on the wall, his head beneath the flow. It makes me want to get to him faster.

I put my hands on his back and he startles, surprised by my sudden appearance, turning his head over his shoulder to look at me.

“Don’t stop,” I tell him.

“I didn’t want to wake you.”

I draw my fingers over the wilted wing on his back and he shivers. “What does this mean?”

He removes his hand from his hard-on, puts it on the wall along with the other, and leans onto his palms, his head still hung low. “It means you still need to be careful around me, Lonnie.”

“I don’t understand.”

“The tattoo is a reminder. I can play the part of an angel, but there are demons inside me.”

“You need both parts to be balanced?”

“No. It’s a reminder that I have to be careful. My father—”

“You’re not your father.”

“No, I’m not, but we share the same DNA. I always have to be careful.”

I wrap my arms around his waist and press in close, turning my cheek to rest against his back. “You don’t have to be careful with me.”

He breaks from my hold, spinning to face me, and I’m forced to take a step back. “Especiallywith you. I don’t ever want to hurt you again.” I blink up at him, watching the intensity as his brown eyes darken as he steps forward, forcing my back to the tiled wall behind me. “I have dark fantasies, Lonnie. Things I could never and would never ask you to play out with me. You don’t even know the extent. I can’t even tell you…” He sighs. “You’ve been hurt so much already.” He reaches out to stroke my cheek and my head falls naturally into his palm. “I don’t want to fuck with your head. You’ve seen enough evil.”

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