Mike winces. “Don’t remind me.”
“What’s going on?” Izzy asks as she rounds the corner and almost barrels straight into Suzy.
“The girls got in trouble,” Suzy says but leaves out all the gory details.
“Thank God I have boys.” She smiles proudly, finally not complaining about having a baby girl to love.
“Hey, Izzy. Did Mom or Dad give you the birds and the bees talk?” Joe asks.
I’m sure she got a different treatment than her brothers. There has always been a double standard when it comes to parenting children.
“Mom did. I think I was like twelve.”
“What did she say?”
“I didn’t even know half the shit she was talking about. Basically, she told me to wait until I was married to let anyone touch me down there. She told me that it was the most sacred gift you could give anyone.”
Mike almost chokes. “She did?”
“No, ya dumb fuck. She told me to wait until I got married because men are assholes and will say anything to get in my pants. She gave me a box of rubbers and brought me to the gynecologist and put me on the pill too. She figured it didn’t matter anyway. With four brothers, I’m sure she assumed I’d never get laid, so why worry.”
That isn’t an option for Lily and Gigi.
We aren’t ready for that yet. Lord, I don’t know if I will ever be ready for that.
“Izzy!” James’s voice carries through the house like a roar. “I need you.”
“Goddamn it. I swear, Trace thinks everything should go in his mouth. I bet he’s eating the Christmas ornaments again. He should be over this phase at his age.”
“Oh, gawd,” I groan and dread the day when Stone starts to eat everything in sight, including Legos and other objects that aren’t meant for consumption.
“Fuckin’ James takes pictures of it for his Instagram. Asshole thinks Trace is the funniest little thing ever. I’m going to junk punch him soon.”
“Bullshit,” Mike coughs out. “I’d like to see you try. Bet your ass gets whipped.”
Izzy winks, smiling at her brother. “Only if I’m lucky.”
Mike’s face scrunches at her words. “Yuck.”
“Oh, stop the bullshit. You know you love to spank my ass,” I tell him with a small giggle, but my cheeks heat at the thought of him buried inside me and his hand coming down on my ass repeatedly.
He places his hand on my ass cheek and gives it a firm squeeze. “Fuck, I love making that ass pink, baby. When I do, your pussy grips…”
“Hey,” Joe says, motioning around the room. “There are children around here, man.”
“Right,” Mike says and bites his lip. “Have kids, they said.” He rolls his eyes and groans. “They’d be fun, they said.” His lip curls and he growls. “All fucking lies.”
Suzy interrupts Mike’s pity party. “You guys should really stop swearing so much around the children.”
“I’m sorry. You’re right. I’ll make an announcement before dinner.”
“This should be interesting,” I mutter because swearing has become almost a second and more expressive language since I’ve become a member of this family.
“It’s best for everyone if we find big-people words to use instead of the dirty ones.”
“Yes, Mrs. Gallo,” Mike teases her in a whiny, little kid voice because she just pulled out the teacher tone.
“You better behave, Michael, or I’m going to have Mia give you detention.”
Mike stares down at me with a cocky smirk. “Only if there’s oral involved.”
“Boys only think about one thing,” I say, shaking my head. But to be honest, when Mike’s around, it’s always on my mind too.
He beams with pride. “Yep.”
Ma walks in with the biggest tray of appetizers I’ve ever seen. “They’re almost here,” she says with excitement. “I never thought I’d see the day when Franny got remarried.”
Two weeks ago, Fran and Bear tied the knot.
“They’ve been gone forever,” Mom says as she sets the tray down on the coffee table near Pop, who’s still holding Stone and watching the video replay of the Cubs winning the World Series for the hundredth time.
“Ma, it’s been ten days since they left for their honeymoon. Calm down,” Anthony tells her, coming out of the kitchen with another tray of food.
His words earn him a glare from Ma. “Hush your mouth. My best friend has been without any type of cell reception or internet for ten days. Do you know how that killed me?”
“Killed me too,” Pop says sarcastically over his shoulder.
Ma gives him a death glare. “Shut up, Sal.” She pushes us out of the way when there’s a knock at the door, making a beeline for the foyer.
Mike and I settle onto the floor of the living room just as Fran and Maria start squealing with delight in the foyer. Joe and Suzy walk away, heading toward the front door, while the rest of us stay put. Pop’s still holding Stone, Izzy and James are off with Trace somewhere, Max and Anthony are curled up on the sofa, and Thomas and Angel are standing in the backyard, watching Nick “the Streaker” like a hawk.
The kids are running around the house, their screams of happiness while playing carrying through the sprawling two-story house. The cacophony only dims when they run out the open sliding doors lining the back of the house, but they quickly return and do it all over again. They’re making a circle pattern—up the staircase, around the top floor, back down, out, and back again. I’m exhausted just watching them and more than a little jealous of their endless energy.
Mike’s hand is resting against my middle, stroking my stomach slowly. “Maybe I knocked you up again, Doc,” he whispers in my ear, and I can feel his smile against my skin. Diapers and sleepless nights weren’t my favorite, but they definitely weren’t Mike’s thing.
“If there’s a baby inside me, Michael, I’ll never have sex with you again,” I whisper back, but we both know it’s a lie.
“There’s the big guy,” Anthony says when Bear and Fran walk into the room with Ma close behind. “What the hell do I call you now? Uncle Bear?” Anthony scratches his head in confusion.
“You’re an idiot,” Thomas tells Anthony and shakes his head in disgust.
Pop climbs to his feet, placing Stone on his hip, and wraps his sister in a half hug. “Franny, you look relaxed.”
Fran steps back, laughing nervously as she slides back under Bear’s arm. “I spent ten days in bed with this big lug. I should be in a coma.”
