Lilly

Once again I have no idea what time it is.

We’ve played around in the bathroom and bedroom for hours.

Now we’re in the bath. I couldn’t resist. It’s so beautiful I just wanted to sit in it.

He’s sitting behind me and I’m nestled between his legs. The bubbles that remain still smell like papaya and make me think of eating fruit.

We’ve just been sitting in the silence enjoying each other’s company. Christian leans forward and plants a kiss on my shoulder. The caress of his warm lips on my skin brings a smile to my face.

I’ve been smiling like an idiot all night, high on the man, addicted to his touch.

“What are you thinking?” he asks.

“Nothing. Sometimes I think so much my brain hurts,” I answer with a chuckle. “It’s nice to think of nothing.”

I glance up at him, remembering his books in the room. Being backwards and forwards in there through the course of the night gave me a better look.

“What about you?” I begin. “I saw your books. I don’t know anyone with books like that. I didn’t thinkyouwould have books like that.”

He smirks at me. “What kind of books did you think I would have?”

I shake my head. “I don’t know. Health mags and motorcycles.” I laugh when he does.

“I’ve always been into tech. I aced it in school and anything science related or mathematical. I could solve math problems within seconds when I was a kid. You’ve seen my family, their all tough guys and the friends we had were no different. I used to try to look stupid, like a dumb jock in front of them. I’d go out of my way to get in trouble for shit. Then… things changed and I embraced it.” he says. there’s a sadness in his eyes that dulls the vibrancy in his expression. “I was flunking in school purposely to look cooler. The plan backfired on me when they gave me a tutor who could see through my shit straightaway.”

“Why on earth would you try to cover a talent like that. It’s not cool to look stupid.”

Playfully he flicks water on me and tweaks my nose.

“It is when you design and algorithm when you’re fifteen and you get a letter from M.I.T inviting you for a chat to consider starting college early.”

I gasp. “What? Oh my God. That happened?”

“It did baby.”

“Why wouldn’t you want that?”

“I didn’t. It wasn’t me and I knew well enough to know that if I’d accepted something like that, that would have been my path forever. Sure the whole stupid act was dumb shit, but it was just my way of acting out. I didn’t want to pushed to go to college and grow up faster. I wanted to be a high school kid. I went to Yale in the end and I loved it.” he smiles.

“That’s so amazing.”

“Thanks. I might have gone the wrong way about doing things but I know I made the right decision about college.” He leans forward and kisses my forehead. I run my fingers over his beard and he catches my hand. “What about you Lilly St. James? I have a question for you.”

“Fire away.”

“What do you think of when you dance?” he asks. “When you dance it’s like you’re somewhere else. I don’t think it’s about concentrating. It’s in the way you move.”

I’m surprised he noticed that. Not many people do.

“My … mother,” I answer. “I think of her.”

“Your mother?”

I nod. “I had two left feet when I was little, but it was my dream to dance. She saw that and she helped me believe I could be the dancer I wanted to be. I was grateful she got to see me through the my success. She was so thrilled when I got into Julliard. All those years of sacrifice paid off. I remember her working two jobs at one point so I could go to dance classes. I think of her because she believed in me. I miss her.”

“I’m sorry baby. What …took her from you?”