The latter is my only concern and why I want Snade. He was the last part of the puzzle.

If I can’t dig around the shit looking for which Fontaine is responsible for what’s going on I can dig elsewhere. The fucking problem with digging elsewhere is moving further away from the people who know what went down.

And if you’re me you don’t find shit. As if a man like Snade would be easy to find.

Close to a week passes and everyday sees me like this.

The only solace and respite I get it is with Mia at night. Last night was intense and fury filled me when I woke this morning and realized it was Saturday. Her fucking day off.

Last weekend was shit. I wanted her but I let it slide. I decided I couldn’t be an asshole and call her out on her day off. Weekend off.

Today is different. I don’t have the patience I had last weekend.

No, fuck that… I didn’t have patience last week.

I just wasn’t as hyped up on fury as I am now.

I’ve hit rock bottom.

The end of what I can class as patience. That must be the only explanation for why I’m parked outside Mia’s house at one in the fucking morning.

I got here an hour ago and I’ve been watching her place.

She lives in a nice house. Very vanilla. It’s one of those classic suburban style homes that match the others on the road. There’s a porch with a front board swing and long French windows that add class to the exterior.

There’s a rose garden with hanging potted plants. The place feels like her.

It’s not enough though.

I don’t want something that feels like her.

I fucking want her. Her body, her submission, her mind, her soul.

I want to fuck her tight pussy recklessly and lose myself in her.

What I need is hot sex. Fucking hot sex that will distract the shit out of me.

I could almost laugh at myself.

So many women want to be with me. I have options galore, more than I can count. Yet look at me.

Nickoli Giordano looking for a good fuck from the one woman he can’t get out of his head. I’m outside this chick’s house thinking about fucking her and holding off because it’s her weekend off.

I palm my erection as the image of my angel doll pops into my head and I decide I need her.

I need her. I can’t just sit here and look like some idiot. What happens when the sun comes up? If that happens I’ll feel worse like a fool and I don’t need that on my head to add to the shit.

I need her now.

I don’t fucking care what time it is, or what day. Time to call in on her punishment for not showing up to work that first night.

I whip out my phone and text her:

I’m outside. I need to fuck. Let me in.

I smile to myself as I imagine her reaction. I’m not surprised when the light snaps on from what I guess is her bedroom.

I get out of my car and make my way to her front door.