Page 50 of His Little Garnet

I want to comfort him. I need to. So I waddle toward the door that leads outside. It’s huge and glass. The handle is up pretty high, but I manage to grab ahold of it and pull as hard as I can to get it to open.

As soon as it slides far enough for me to squeeze through the opening, I step outside.

Papi’s back is toward me, but he turns at that moment to pace in my direction. He freezes when he sees me. His eyes go wide. His face is kind of red as if he’s angry. No…sad. His hair is wild from pulling on it.

He’s breathing heavily as he says into the phone, “I’ll call you back.” He ends the call and lowers the phone before rushing toward me and then stopping at the last second, not touching me.

I tip my head back to meet his gaze. “Are you okay, Papi? You look so sad.”

“I’m fine.” He glances at the door. “How did you…”

I swallow. “I’m sorry. I broke like ten of your rules. I was scared. I woke up, and you weren’t there, and I started to think something bad happened to you, and I got more scared, and I climbed out of my crib to come find you, and then I saw you out here and… Papi? Why are you crying?”

Tears are running down his cheeks, and he swipes them away as he bends to lift me into his arms. He pushes the door open wider and carries me into the house, heading straight for his favorite armchair.

After sitting, he hugs me so close to him I can’t breathe. He kisses my neck and inhales deeply. He does that a lot. I know he likes to inhale my scent because I do the same to him.

For a long time, I let him hold me. I’m worried though. Why is he sad?

Finally, I wiggle in his arms, pushing to lean back. I take his cheeks in my hands and meet his gaze. “I’m sorry you’re sad, Papi. Can I make it better?”

He gives me a small smile and wipes his eyes.

“Did someone get hurt, Papi?” Or worse…

He shakes his head. “No, Baby girl. No one is hurt.”

“Then why are you so sad?” I insist. I want him to be able to share with me. I hate that he’s hurting, and he doesn’t feel like he can tell me why. That’s my fault. I’ve been a terrible life partner.

He sets his hands on top of mine and pulls them around to kiss my palms.

I start to cry now. My lip is trembling. Emotions overwhelm me. I need him to know I’m here for him. That I love him. “I’m sorry I’ve been such a naughty girl, Papi. I’m sorry I’ve pushed you away. I don’t know why I’ve been such a bratty girl.” I suck back a sob that’s making my voice crack.

“Baby girl…”

I shake my head. “I’m supposed to be your sweet Little girl. You went all the way to Earth to find me, and you’ve been the best Papi in the universe from the moment we met. I’ve been nothing but awful to you. I’ve carried around my stupid mad for weeks. Dumb stupid mad. All I did was alienate you. When I woke up from my nap, I realized I wanted to be done being mad. I’m the luckiest girl in the universe. I have the bestest Papi alive. I have everything I could ever want, and, and, and…”

I suck back another sob. “And I wanted to tell you. And then you didn’t come to my room, and I got scared. And I called out to you, and you didn’t come. And then I broke the rules and climbed out of my crib to come find you. And I’m so naughty that you don’t even want to share your sadness with me because I’m not a good person.”

His eyes go wide.

I keep rambling. “I want to be your special Little girl. I want to be your life partner. I want to hold you when you’re sad just like you hold me when I’m sad.” My voice dips. “You also hold me when I’m mad and don’t deserve it.”

I swallow over the lump in my throat and keep going. “My heart hurts that you can’t share with me. I love you so much, Papi. I’m done being mad. I want to be your good girl. I want to be the one person you can talk to if you’re sad.”

He wipes my tears away with his thumbs, holds my face, and brings his lips to mine. After a sweet kiss, he sets his forehead against mine. “I love you so much, Olivia. I’m not sad anymore.”

I frown and then realization dawns. “Were you sad because of me?”

He nods. “I was talking to Thabo. I needed someone to help me figure out what to do. My heart was hurting all the time because you were so distant.”

More tears fall. “I’m sorry, Papi.” I hiccup. “I won’t be mad anymore.”

He smiles. “I’m so glad to hear that. I’m also sorry. Sorry you felt so out of place since you got here. My heart can’t take it.” He meets my gaze again. “And as for the clinic, I want you to know that Thabo and I have spoken about giving you some tasks.”

I nearly jump off his lap in excitement. “Really?”

He nods. “Don’t get carried away. You’re not going to start working fulltime by any stretch of the imagination. But I know helping people feel better is important to you. Plus, I’ve watched you nurture all the Little girls who came into the clinic lately. Our medical practices might not look exactly like what you’ve learned, but you have a knack for helping people relax. Do you think maybe you could do that for Papi? Maybe hold another Little girl’s hand when she’s scared?”

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