Page 84 of Trapped In Love

He moaned, and I knew he was close too, but instead of choking me harder, he cupped my face in both hands and kissed me. He devoured me with his mouth while he came inside me.

He pressed tiny kisses down my jawline until he moved to my neck. He always kissed me gently on my neck after wrapping his hand around it in a tight embrace. It was a sweet gesture of aftercare that I would miss when he was gone. We stayed joined for a moment, neither of us wanting to sever our connection quite yet. I held him tightly, willing him to never escape from my embrace.

He didn’t see the tears when he rolled off me and went into the bathroom to throw out the condom. I tried to wipe them away and squeezed my eyes shut to prevent them from falling. I didn’t want Felix to see me cry because my heart didn’t want to let him go. I wanted to convince him we had a chance, but I was out of time. He was firm on this being just a fling, and I couldn’t expect more. I wished my heart would have listened.

The bed sunk down beside me, and when I opened my eyes, Felix gave me a look of concern. His dark brown eyes were filled with worry. A stray tear slid down my cheek, and he jumped up in alarm.

“Sweet thing, what’s wrong?” he asked, pulling me into his lap. He cradled me in his embrace and held me. The way he wanted to protect me made everything worse.

I shook my head, but I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t tell him my feelings had gotten in the way, and I had fallen in love with him.

He gingerly pressed a hand to my neck. “Did I hurt you?”

I looked up at him in shock. “What?”

“When I choked you.”

He looked upset. If he had hurt me, I would have used my safe motion. We always talked about that, but he never strayed from my boundaries. Choking during sex could be dangerous, but I trusted him completely.

“No. No, Felix, you didn’t hurt me. At least not physically.”

He cupped my face and stared at me deeply. “What are you saying?”

“I don’t want this to end. I don’t want to drive home in tears tomorrow.”

His face fell. “Gem.”

I held up a hand. “It’s okay. You told me the rules, but my heart disobeyed.”

“Gem, I don’t want this to end, either.”

I stared up at him with my mouth agape. “What?”

He ran a hand through my hair. “My sister will always come before you—”

“I know!” I interrupted him. “And that’s okay. You could have told me what was going on instead of being a jackass.”

He grimaced. “I didn’t want your pity.”

I raised my eyebrow in confusion.

He sighed. “I didn’t want you to know how hard my life has been. That I’ve picked up the pieces my mom broke when she left. My dad’s not a bad guy. He’s in jail for drug charges. He has a disease, but it made him a shitty father. I can’t be like that for my sister. She needs me.”

I pressed a hand against his chest, over his heart. “Felix, that’s what I love about you. You sacrificed your whole life for that little girl. You’ll give her everything you never had, and that makes me like you more.”

“Maybe we can try?” he offered, but he looked unsure.

“Try?”

He shrugged. “I didn’t think I had the time to give you a relationship. But if you understand that there will be times I’ll cancel on you because of Skye, maybe we can do this. I don’t want to go home tomorrow with a broken heart because I can’t have you.”

I cupped his face in both of my hands. “Felix, the thought of you leaving me tomorrow breaks my heart. I don’t want this to be a vacation fling.”

“You’d never be a fling. You shine too bright for that. I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“I understand your life’s complicated. But you can have it all. Job, me, and taking care of your sister. You don’t have to sacrifice your love life because of your responsibilities.”

I pressed a soft kiss to his lips, and he kissed me back with all the passion he could muster, like he was showing me how much he loved me with the kiss. Neither of us said the words, but we both knew what the kiss meant. I didn’t know why I bothered pretending I could be okay with only one week with him.

---