Page 18 of Wolf Heart

He straightens up, and I get my first look at him in the morning light. Dark circles frame eyes. And a five o’clock shadow hugs his square jawline makes him seem rakish and dangerous.

My chest feels tight, and I wonder for the thousandth time if searching for my mom will fix me. If I can trust these three or if I'm in over my head. Except, I can’t just sit at home and wait for my wolf.

No, I can never go back to the pack until I have manifested my wolf and can prove it to them. To all of them. Deep inside I know if I don’t, they will never accept me back.

What if she doesn’t want to see me? I don’t have her address or anything. My mom gave me up when I was a baby. Will she be like me with blue hair? What if she hates me?

After all, she gave me up when I was a baby.

I wrap my arms around myself and watch Aspen, Dex, and Raven pack up their belongings. I have nothing except the clothes on my back. Tears prickle the backs of my eyes, but I blink them back hard and fast.

Crying won’t help anything and it certainly won’t’ bring my wolf out. I stand up and rake a hand through my hair, dislodging leaves and twigs. What I wouldn’t give for a shower and a toothbrush.

“Hungry?” Dex asks me.

I nod.

He hands me a dark, brown piece of something and I stare at it. His laughter brings my gaze up to his smiling face. There’s a glint of gold in each iris shining like a star around his pupils that mesmerizes me for a moment. “It’s jerky. Don’t you have that in the pack?”

“No.” I shake my head, tearing off a bite of the jerky. It’s dry and hard to chew. I manage to swallow it down. “We’ve got an icehouse to keep all the meat the pack hunts down for us and only kill when needed.”

“Out here,” Dex gestures to the land spread out in front of us like a blanket, “You never know when your next meal is coming. The game here is harder to hunt with us not being the only starving ones.”

I shudder. “You mean the lost ones.” The humans who didn’t accept the change after the meteors crashed into our water supply.

It was like the radiation brought out whatever was hidden inside people. For us, it was wolves. For others it was magic and they became witches. And for some, darkness and evil lived inside them and they became that on the outside.

“For the longest time, I thought Casey was one of them and couldn’t understand why he was allowed in the pack.”

Dex’s upper lip curls. “He the one that rejected you?”

“No.” I swallow, my throat suddenly feeling dry and tight. “Just a jerk.” Somehow saying Michael’s name out loud felt too final. Like I was admitting that he refused to accept me.

My wolf howls inside adding to the weight pressing down on my heart. I want to free her so we’ll get the promise of my life back. Make Casey eat his words. Watch him eat his words and see me at an Alpha's side. Though I shouldn't care about Casey or Michael. But the rejection is too new, too raw from the latter who I thought was the answer to all my problems.

Now I have a whole new heap of them.

The wind kicks up the leaves spread around the tree we slept in and I shudder, wrapping my arms around myself to keep warm. The bonfire had given off too much heat for me to have dressed in warmer clothes last night. Now I regret my wardrobe choice of a thin shirt and torn jeans.

Aspen nods to me as he adjusted the bag strapped to his back. “You don’t have any belongings?”

“Kinda left in a hurry.” My throat tightens thinking of how my stepmom wouldn't even allow me a second to grab anything.

Aspen grunts and removes one of the blankets from last night and holds it out to me.

“I’ll be fine.” I lift my chin, trying to keep my body from shaking and betraying me.

“Don’t be foolish.” He presses the blanket at me.

“Thanks.” I tuck the blanket around my shoulders and torso. It isn't as warm as my coat would’ve been, but I'm grateful for anything at this point. I hate relying on anyone else. I learned the hard way when Dad died not to count on anyone but myself. And here I am, depending on three total strangers. I shake my head.

“We need to get to the city before nightfall.” Raven marches ahead, not even looking back to see if we follow.

“Why?” I ask. “Couldn’t we just set up camp like we did last night?”

“You weren’t kidding when you said you’d never crossed the barrier.” Aspen whistles. “The closer to the barrier we are, the safer.”

I frown, looking from Raven’s retreating to our camp. “Then why not skirt the outside of the pack lands and slowly make our way outward?”

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