Page 20 of Fall for Me

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I should have felt guilty. Instead, I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Not all the weight. Not even half of it. But enough that I could breathe again.

I’d instructed Mia to meet me in the back parking lot in ten minutes. While I waited for the voices outside to trail off down the hall, I straightened my wild hair as best I could in the mirror. There wasn’t much I could do about the bruises, though they had already started to fade to a brownish yellow, but for once, I didn’t care.

I slipped out of the bathroom, only to come face-to-face with my sister, her brows slanted with concern.

My stomach flipped. I shouldn’t have assumed I’d get out that easy.

“You sure you’re okay?” she asked, coming toward me. She’d been packing a cloth bag with get-well-soon cards and boxes of chocolates.

“Yeah.” I looked around, but she was the only one here.

“They brought the first load down,” Cass explained.

At least it would be easier with only her. Still, my insides twisted with nerves as I looked at my sister. “Cass, I called Mia. She’s going to come and pick me up.”

“What?” Cass nearly dropped the stack of cards in her hand. She grabbed them messily against her chest, her eyes wide. “Chelsea, are you nuts? You need to go home!”

“Blake’s coming soon, right?”

“Yes, but—”

“You’ve barely been home since I woke up. You guys need your time alone.”

“Chelsea, we can stand a few days apart. You’re my sister."

“Cass, please.” Something in my voice must have struck her this time. Maybe it was the honesty, the words coming from my core.

Which was unlike me.

“I just need a little space.”

“Oh,” she said, clearly a little wounded. The cards slipped in her hands, and I reached out and took the pile from her, straightening them into a stack on the table.

“Cass, it’s not personal. I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do now. I just need time to think.”

“You’re supposed to rest.”

“You know what I mean.”

I looked into my sister’s eyes—my sister who loved me, who wanted the best for me. “Cass, I don’t know who I am, okay? I need to figure that out. And I’m not going to find that out at a nightclub or in bed with some random guy.”

Finally, though I could tell it killed her, she nodded. “Okay. Space.”

I really did love her, and a sadness slipped over me that I hadn’t taken advantage of our last year together. I could have turned to her instead of away from everyone.

But she’d moved out when I was twelve, and we’d lived so far away from each other, and led such different lives in the time since, that it almost felt like we were starting from scratch.

“Listen, why don’t we hang out soon?” I asked. “Just you and me.”

She nodded, tears welling in her eyes.

“For now, can you just tell everyone I’m… going for a drive? I’ll be home later.”

“Of course, Chels. Whatever you need.”

I grabbed the coat she’d brought for me and carefully hung on the back of the door. Then I went back and hugged my big sister.

I may not always be able to share everything with her, but I did love her. So much. She squeezed me carefully, as if worried I might break.

Then, before I could change my mind, I slipped out the door.

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