Page 99 of Fall for Me

That rolling gravel felt like rolling rocks now, dancing under the surface of the Quince.

“No, you didn’t,” I said. “Not now, and not back then.” I thought of my mom, stroking my hair, trying to calm me after that failed art show. I never told her what happened, but she found me curled up in my room, refusing to come out, refusing to speak. Hiding might feel safe, Peanut, but we’re just putting off the feelings for later. Sometimes the fastest way to heal is straight through the pain.

Those words hit me now, all too clearly. Tears ran down my face.

I looked down at Seamus’s hands, at the thing he’d been holding. Keys. The keys to the company his father had given him. A symbolic gesture. I thought about how Seamus never locked anything, not his house, not his car. Not even his heart, for me.

But these keys didn’t mean locking. They meant a new beginning.

For him.

I closed his hand over them, remembering the first time he’d taken my hands, in his office. When he’d blown on my wounds, making them better with just a breath.

“You’re going to do great,” I said, gently guiding him to the side.

Then I let him go and ran past him into the glowing stairwell.

Outside, away from the heat lamps up top, the cold air blowing off the Quince onto the street was frigid. I barely noticed. Just like I barely noticed the crowd of people standing at the entrance to the restaurant, laughing and happy. The couples walking along the river walk under the glow of streetlamps.

It was only when I reached my car that I saw Eli running across the street toward me.

“Leave me alone, Eli,” I said, fumbling with my keys.

“Chelsea, where are you going?”

I thought wildly. Where the hell was I going? I’d only thought of away. “I’m going to Greenville. To the animal shelter.” Maybe I could salvage one good thing here. Maybe that love would be enough.

“Now? Chelsea, it’s Saturday night. They won’t be open to the public.”

“I don’t care.”

My door locks popped. I was about to slide into the seat when Eli grabbed my door. “I’ll drive.”

I hesitated, looking up at him. He was serious. Without a word, I handed him my keys, thinking of the set in Seamus’s hand upstairs.

We made it halfway to Greenville before I spoke. “Pull over, Eli.”

Eli pulled onto the shoulder without a word. We were at the top of a stretch of low hills here. Far to our left, the Quince glinted in the starlight. The only sound was the car rumbling under us, the heat rushing out of the vents.

“It’s pointless,” I said. “I can’t take her, anyway.”

For a moment, we both looked out toward the water. “Maybe Jude?” Eli said. “He has a yard.”

“He’s already looking after Rafe’s dog,” I said.

“Maybe he can take another?”

He probably could. He’d probably do that for me. But it wasn’t about Lola.

I shook my head. “Lola should be adopted by someone who can love her the way she deserves. Someone steady and with their life together.”

“You’re going to be that person, remember?”

“I just walked out on an event I organized. How can you call that on my way to getting my shit together?”

“Everyone else has it in hand for now. I’ll head back there too for the take-down. No one blames you for leaving, Chels. Jamie wanted to go after you himself. He was worried.”

I looked at my brother. He ran his hand through his hair. “And I had to hold Seamus back.”

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