Page 88 of Just Breathe

I stood there for a few more minutes, soaking in the heat, before I quickly washed up and got out. Drying myself off quickly, I put my hair up in my towel, so I could get changed. I got ready in fifteen minutes, putting a little of makeup on and braiding my hair quickly. I stood in the room looking at the door, nervous about stepping out of my bubble of safety after packing up my luggage again and slipping on a pair of tennis shoes to match my leggings and T-shirt.

I opened the door, staying still, listening for voices or any noise. It sounded like someone was in the kitchen, so that’s where I headed, feeling anxiety as I took each step. I rounded the corner, seeing Nathan cooking away. He looked relaxed in jeans and a T-shirt. I instantly felt a little better because it didn’t seem like he was too angry last night and he just seemed easier to deal with.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he said, flipping a pancake in the air. “Give me five minutes and I’ll be done with breakfast.” He finally turned around and gave me a shy smile.

I smirked at his playfulness, thankful that at least something didn’t change too much.

“Thanks Nathan.” I made my way to the bar to take a seat. “Do you know where my phone is?”

“I haven’t seen it. It might be in the truck.” Nathan poured a cup of coffee for me and set it next to cream and sugar. I grabbed his hand around the cup, looking up at him. I didn’t know what to say, but I just had to look at him to see if we were ok. He looked at our hands for a minute, then made his way up to my face. He gave me a sad smile before he turned away.

We apparently weren’t ok. Seeing his sad smile confirmed they made a decision without me. I felt the rejection not just from Nathan, but from all of them. Whatever happened when we were with Lucio triggered something, and now I was dealing with the fallout.

He changed something with the guys. The urge to cry was overwhelming, and I don’t know why I felt like I lost Nathan and Aiden, too. They weren’t mine, Callum wasn’t even mine, but losing all of them felt unbearable.

A sob was threatening to come out, so I bit my lip to stop it. I took a deep breath, trying to control all my emotions. Looking down at my coffee cup, I hoped he didn’t notice the breakdown that was threatening to surface. He laid a plate out in front of me, turning away quickly, allowing more time to get my shit together.

I didn’t want to eat, but the smell made my stomach clench in need, and it didn’t help that the smell was heavenly. He grabbed a plate and sat down next to me while we ate in silence.

“How are you feeling?” Nathan asked hesitantly, like he didn’t know how to go about interacting with me.

“Don’t, Nathan,” I whispered, my voice shaky. I finished my food, taking my plate to the sink, to rinse it and put it in the dishwasher.

“Can I have a ride home?” I asked, turning around from the sink.

“Of course, Aiden is already there meeting with the inspector and I’m sure by the time we get there, they will have cleared everything.” He brought his plate over and I sidestepped him, not want to be close to him.

“I’ll get my things.” I felt my walls building back up again. The same walls I needed to survive losing my husband and baby. I walked back to the room to get my thing’s, noticing Nathan was following me. “You don’t have to--.”

“You have four bags. I don’t think you can carry all of them.” He tried to smile at me, but I turned away quickly, not wanting to be sucked into his charm. I rolled out the luggage to the front of the house, running into Tango. He was too innocent to ignore, so I stopped and gave him some love.

“Be a good boy.” I kissed his nose. I got up, noticing Nathan staring at me. It was a strange look that felt like was trying to figure me out but couldn’t. It was like he wanted to say something, but he didn’t know how. I looked away before he tried anything. I opened the front door, taking the luggage outside. Nathan walked past me to an SUV that I’ve never seen before.

He opened up the trunk, putting my luggage in, and I went back into the house to make sure I left nothing behind. I looked around the room, noticing that my purse was missing too. I went back to the living room where Nathan was hanging out with Tango.

“Got everything?” he asked, looking stoic.

“I can’t find my purse,” I said, looking around just in case I missed it.

“It’s probably in the truck with your phone.” He put his hands in his pockets. “We can check there and if not, I’ll come back and search the house.”

Nodding, I took a quick glance at Nathan, feeling sad that the usually laid-back guy was looking like this. I took a deep breath before heading outside to the SUV. He followed me, locking up, and we both got into the car in silence. The drive was uncomfortable. Several times it looked like he wanted to say something but didn’t.

What the hell happened? How did we go to casual flirting to this awkwardness? We pulled up to the house, and it looked gorgeous. They’d finished the entire outside. The small patio by the front door looked great, and they finished roof and all the windows. They had also done some landscaping to give the house a more finished look. I opened the door as he put the car in park, and I admired the home Henry and I had designed.

It looked so much better than I could have imagined. I walked up in awe, excited to the house even though I knew not everything was going to be done, but Aiden had said all the important stuff would be done. I opened the black door, letting myself into the main area of the house. Our stone fireplace was the main focal point, and the large windows gave a perfect view of the mountains behind the house.

I smiled at the beauty of the room, so excited to see the rest of the house. Voices came from the kitchen. Aiden came in with all his tools on and someone I assumed was the inspector. He was a short stocky man with a mustache to rival all mustaches. His blue eyes sparkled, and wrinkles surrounded them.

“It looks good, man. I would just reinforce the solar panels and put those insulators on.” The inspector stopped to look outside. “That’s some view.”

Aiden noticed me before the inspector giving me a nod, like we were just acquaintances, or I was nothing more than his client. Ouch.

“Ah, you must be the lovely owner.” The inspector walked toward me. “This is a magnificent home. I’m sure you and your husband are very excited to move in.”

In less than a minute, I felt like I was being emotionally assaulted on all sides. “Thank you, but my husband passed away before he could see our dreams come true.”

Aiden glared at the inspector like it was his fault, but the poor guy probably hadn’t gotten the latest gossip. “I am so sorry. I had heard a while back it was a couple building their home here.” He looked horrified.

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