Page 56 of Just Breathe

“You did great. Let’s get you back in bed. You need to sleep.” She helped me lay down and before she left the bed, I pull her against me to spoon. “Nathan, what are you doing?”

“I like to snuggle and I’m fucking exhausted.” I buried my head into her neck and brought her even closer.

“Let me turn off the lights and then I can come back and snuggle, ok?” She turned around and tried to pull away. I pull her closer to kiss her cheek. She adjusted her head, making my lips land on the corner of her mouth. I rubbed my nose against hers, still debating if I was going to kiss her. I knew I was playing with fire, but I honestly couldn’t give two shits at this point.

I pressed my mouth to her lips softly. An innocent kiss, I didn’t expect for her to return. She pressed her lips against mine, pushing a hand up the side of my face into my hair. I deepened the kiss then licked her lips, seeing if she’s going to let me take it farther. I felt her shiver as she opened for me, massaging my tongue with her own. She pulled back a little, taking my bottom lip and giving it a little bite. I groaned as blood rushed below.

I lifted her and sat her down with one leg on either side of me as I leaned against the headboard. I slid my hands on her ass grabbing a handful and rocked her onto my cock as we continued kissing. She ran her hands through my hair, down my neck, bracing herself on my shoulders as she moved her hips, whimpering as she chased that friction, she needed from me.

“Nathan.” She panted as I kissed her neck. I slid a hand up under her shirt and grabbed a handful of her breast, she grinded on me more as she moaned, the sound making me harder.

“God damn Jane.” I pinched her nipple hard, then brushed my thumb over it to soothe the bite of pain. Her thighs clenched around me as she rolled her hips. I pushed my shirt over her breast when she stilled and pulled back.

“I’m sorry.” I blurted out. “I got carried away. I’m sorry.”

She looked unsure and confused. “It’s fine, I shouldn’t have gotten carried away. I’m sorry.” She looked down at her hands.

“Hey.” I tilted her chin up to look at me. “There is no need for you to apologize. Are you ok? Did I push you too far?”

“No, you didn’t.” She bit her lip. “I just haven’t been with another man, and I just felt overwhelmed.” She slid off my lap sitting in front of me.

I didn’t realize how tense I was thinking I had hurt her. “That’s understandable, you’ve been through a lot, and I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s ok,” she interrupted me. “I wanted everything and if I’m being honest, I wanted more.” She blushed and it was a struggle not to throw her on the bed, sinking deep inside her.

I cleared my throat trying to diffuse some of my arousal despite feeling tired. “Let’s get some rest,”I said laying down holding my arms open to her. She laid her head down on my chest, throwing a leg over mine.

“Thank you,” Jane whispered.

“You don’t have to thank me, baby. We’ll be here when you’re ready.” I kissed her forehead and dozed off.

* * *

The bed shifted, and then I felt a light kiss on my cheek. I tried to reach out quickly, but it I was unsuccessful. I opened my eyes, but the room was empty. The sun was pouring in the window, looking like it was later in the day. Fuck, I still felt like shit. My head was pounding, and my body felt awful. I rolled over to see a note on the nightstand with water, orange juice, some pills, and some toast.

I picked up the note, and it said:Drink and eat. Call me if you need anything, XOXO.The note made me smile, but the XOXO gave me a weird feeling I wasn’t familiar with. I thought of the make out session we shared yesterday, not knowing what to think of it. I felt bad for taking it so far but she responded instantly, kissing me fiercely and the way she works those hips. I was fucked when it came to Jane.

I instantly felt jealous of Callum going to the wedding with her, but I knew I’d fuck up if I went with her. This weekend was going to be shit and at that reminder, I checked my phone. Eleven missed calls. I knew they were from the same person, and they would only get more frequent as this weekend came closer.

I swung my legs over, picking up the water, testing them out, making sure I wouldn’t throw up again. I don’t remember throwing up, but my stomach was sore and from what Jane said yesterday, it definitely felt like I vomited my brains out. I handled the water ok, so I ate some of the toast, making realize how hungry I was. I drank some orange juice, taking the Tylenol she left with it.

I needed another shower, grateful that I could get up by myself, and took a quick rinse, threw on some clothes with my glasses. I walked into the kitchen to get something to eat, opening the fridge to see what to make. Since it was already five, I got enough stuff to get dinner started.

Dinner was almost ready when the guys walked in. “Hey man. How are you feeling?” Aiden walked up to me, laying a hand on my shoulder, inspecting me again.

“Like shit.” I rubbed the back of my neck, embarrassed. I did not know what the hell happened and Janes mentioning me being drugged made me nervous. “But definitely better than yesterday. Food should be ready in 15 minutes.”

“Alright, I’m going to shower, and then we can talk about what happened.” Aiden walked off when I noticed Callum looking me over.

“I’m doing better,” I said again, feeling like an idiot. He nodded his head and headed towards his room.

After they showered, we ate in silence, grateful that I had a moment to get my thoughts in order because every time I thought of what happened yesterday, I couldn’t remember shit.

“Where did you go after you got the call?” Callum asked after Aiden took his last bite. We all knew what call I received, making me more nervous that they knew, even though I tried to hide that part of my life from them. I was ashamed even though they never judged me for it, but I still felt awful.

“When I answered as soon as I heard her voice, I hung up. This year I just don’t want to deal with her anymore. I… I just can’t do it anymore. I didn’t want to deal with it, so I went and bought a few beers.” I looked down at my plate, trying to dig in my brain to see what the fuck happened after that.

“Just a few?” Aiden asked, calling bullshit without actually saying it.

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