Page 14 of Aries Mated

TJ

All this talk about marriage had my stomach churning like crazy. It made me think about all the things I desperately wanted to forget. My debt. The money I had to pay back via this freaking competition. I hated the way I had gotten myself in to such financial trouble. I never wanted to be one of those people getting trapped in a spiral of trouble, but somehow it had happened. Somehow I washere. Even with my pilot job that paid me well enough, I was trapped in a hole, using the Astro Games to try to get me out. The debtor I owed money to knew this was the quickest way for me to pay him back because it allowed him to place bets on me. I could chip away at the giant total I needed gone and finally be free.

Never again. That was one thing I could be absolutely certain of. It didn’t matter what happened, I would not allow myself to sink like this another time. Once the debt was done, I would never slide back there. I couldn’t.

“Well, I think the games are cool!” Sol declared. “And I can’t wait for the parkour event.”

“Matt thinks he’s a shoo-in because of his yoga abilities,” Kai said, causing laughter to bubble up inside of me.

Because this new joyful feeling was so unexpected, I allowed it to burst free. My laughter caused everyone else to join in, which delighted Sol. I leaned forward and ruffled his hair playfully. I had to admit that the boy’s wide smile warmed my heart. There was something about him that endeared me to him. He was like my sister’s boys, my nephews. The boys who would be in alotof trouble if I didn’t push on with this competition and do the best I could. By no means was I going to win—I didn’t want to marry the princess and get all caught up in the political world—but second place would be ideal. If I could do that, I would be home free. Anything less would leave me with some debt, and I much preferred the idea of having none. I turned my head away from everyone and kept that thought at the forefront of my mind, where it always needed to be.

Fuck.I shouldn’t be here, laughing and having the best time, when I really needed to be training, practicing, keeping my head in the game. I wasn’t quite sure how I’d allowed myself to get so distracted. But I also didn’t want to leave just yet. I was having a really good time and I liked the idea of helping Sol because I could tell he really needed it. Just like I did when I was a kid.

“Does anyone want dessert?” Maeve asked as she rose to her feet. “I have some treats in the kitchen…”

Everyone heartily agreed, including myself. I wasn’t the only one who stood up to assist Maeve with carrying the plates back into the kitchen, but since she didn’t need all of us and Matt was nearest to the kitchen, he ended up helping her out.

“Can I show you something?” Sol asked, reaching out to grab Atlas’s hand. Kai’s too. It was only when he had his hands full that he looked to me in horror. “Oh, TJ, you as well…”

“Lead the way,” I said eagerly. “Let’s see what you’ve got.”

I needed a distraction to take my mind off all the stress and pressure I was under. We ended up in Sol’s bedroom, where he had a half-finished Lego project of an army truck that was going to end up being twice his size. It was impressive, and something that it seemed Sol wanted some help with.

“Hey, this is cool,” Atlas said first, running his fingers gently over the piece that was currently built. “I like it.”

“Mom said it’s like the sort of army truck my father would have driven if he had finished cadet school.”

I automatically picked up a Lego piece and fit it where I could see it needed to go. Sol handed me another couple of pieces to fit in the same place.

“That’s awesome,” Kai declared with a little laugh. “I’m sure your dad will be thrilled to help you finish this.”

Atlas sucked in a sharp breath. Weird. What was I missing here? I glanced over to Sol, whose eyes were lowering.

“My daddy died,” he whispered. There was so much pain radiating from him, I could hardly stand it. It was too much.

Oh shit. I did not know what I was supposed to say to that. My eyes darted over to Kai, whose eyes had almost popped out of his head.

“My father is dead too,” Kai finally admitted as he patted Sol on the back. “But you know, I always have my dad with me in my heart. Just like you do.”

Sol pressed his hand to his heart and smiled to himself. I could almost see the change within him. Knowing that he wasn’t alone and would always have his dad with him had to be like a weight off his shoulders. Thank goodness, because that situation could have gotten really awkward. It was a relief when Sol started focusing on the Lego pieces once more, talking a mile a minute about what he was creating. I barely knew this kid, but I wanted him to be okay and happy.

We all built together for a little while, working in sync without even needing to talk. I’d never bonded with people in this way, but there was something about these guys that I just felt comfortable with. I felt calm and relaxed for the first time in a very long time. I had felt that pull toward Kai on the very first day of the Astro Games, and was glad that we’d become friends, but I didn’t expect to feel that way with other guys as well. Especially someone like Atlas, who I found a little intimidating before.

“Hey, where are you guys?” Maeve appeared in the doorway with Matt by her side. There was a flush to her cheeks that really suited her. “What are you doing in here? Working on the army tank, huh?”

“It’s a great tank,” Atlas commented with a smile. “It looks just like the one I worked with when I was in the army.”

“So, youdoknow my dad?” Sol asked with a cocked eyebrow. “Were you in the cadets together?”

Atlas nodded slowly. This was huge news, but my main concern was Sol and how he was going to take this. But he smiled. He actually smiled. Kai’s words must have worked. I couldn’t help but notice Sol press his hand to his chest once more.

“Well, that’s cool,” Sol announced. “My dad was a cool person, wasn’t he?”

“Sol, your dad was incredible. He was one of the best people I have ever met.” Sol stared at him in awe. “You are very much like your dad. You look just like him, you know? And he would love this Lego project.”

I couldn’t resist turning around to look at Maeve, to see how she was handling this. Tears welled in her eyes. She looked a little bit broken for a moment, which made my heart shatter into a million pieces. If the other guys weren’t here, I would have had her in my arms in an instant, trying to comfort her. Maeve must have sensed my eyes on her, because she snapped her gaze around to look at me. Very quickly she wiped her tears away and forced a smile on her lips. “I’m okay,” she mouthed to me. “Honest.”

She wasn’t though, she couldn’t be, this had to be hard for her. It didn’t matter when death happened, it still had an impact on life. Especially at moments like this, when there was a child left behind. Poor Sol, poor Maeve. This was so sad for them. I would have done anything to take their pain away.

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