Page 69 of A Gentleman's Wife

Chapter Thirty

Thomas had not come to sleep.

The words kept repeating in Marianne’s mind, over and over again, all morning long. She had changed into her nightdress the evening before, anticipating he would return and explain what had put him in such a somber mood that afternoon before the dinner party. He had attempted to reassure her in the carriage, but she could tell there was still something wrong, some distracting worry in the back of his mind. She rested in his bed, waiting as the candlewax melted down before she finally fell asleep. And when she woke, his side of the bed was still cold.

At breakfast, Collins reported he’d gone away on business, that he had legal matters to attend, without much more clarity. There could have been any number of reasons Thomas would have gone away, for some gentlemen were very busy. But given his status the day before, Marianne was certain he’d gone to address his concerns. She wished he’d confided in her what the problems were, but perhaps their relationship had not grown to that privilege yet, where he would entrust his wife with his business as well. He’d talked to her of the tenant farmer’s struggles before, so this must have been something more.

Marianne had tried to distract herself with books and reading, visiting the horses in the stables, and taking a walk in the gray cold with Eliza, but thoughts of Thomas alone consumed her mind. She ended up in the music room of all places, knowing full well she’d not be able to think on anything else but him, and yet, she couldn’t stay away.

Her fingers clumsily pressed on the keys of the pianoforte, not truly seeing them, for she was delving into her memories. He’d kissed her twice in the music room, both experiences exquisite. First on the piano seat, the softest kiss to test the waters with the promise of more. The second time by the mirror, stealing her breath away with his passion. This room would be a sanctuary for her, a place where she needn’t worry about the criticism of her hosting abilities or lack of tea service, or even playing a simple tune with her one hand. She could trust that Thomas wanted her, no matter her flaws. She would depend on that. She had to, else she would go mad.

A knock sounded at the door, and Marianne’s fingers slid over the keys, hitting unharmonious notes, making her smile. “Yes, come in.”

“You have callers, madam,” Collins announced.

Marianne straightened immediately. “Who is it?”

Only then did she notice how Collins remained stiff, a crease in his furrowed brow. “Mr. and Mrs. Taylor.”

Dread filled her chest and spread throughout her entire body. She was suddenly chilled to the bone at the thought of being under the same roof as her parents again. She had known she would have to face them again someday, and she couldn’t very well write them off forever, but oh, how she wished she could. Why had they traveled all this way to see her? And on a day that Thomas was gone so she’d have to face them alone?

With heart pounding at twice the speed, Marianne let out a deep breath. “Please show them to the drawing room. I will be there shortly.”

After Collins bowed and disappeared, Marianne slowly closed the cover over the keys and lowered her head to rest it on top. Her mind whirled with worries and questions, but she needed to calm herself or she’d turn into the disaster her parents truly believed she was. She sat up and took a few fortifying breaths before shakily rising to her feet and leaving the safety of the music room. If she could manage a ballroom full of strangers, she could manage her parents.

She blindly walked down the corridor until she stood before the door of the drawing room, where Collins waited for her. Tucking her right hand behind her left hand, she cast him a nervous glance. “Stay close, Collins.” Her voice wavered, so she straightened her shoulders.

“I’ll be just outside the door,” he said with a reassuring nod.

And with that, he opened the door. Marianne walked in to find her mother and father, seated in armchairs close to the fire.

“Good day, Mother, Father. Welcome to Primrose House.”

Marianne was still in the middle of her curtsy when her mother’s disappointed tone filled the room. “I must say, Marianne, I was surprised you lasted as long as you did, being the woman of such a fine house. But it’s as I expected. You’ve already failed.”

A chill seized her heart, squeezing it tight at the word. “Failed?”

“Indeed. Word of your ball has reached London, and it is nothing complimentary, my dear. News of your hand, and your illness,” Mother said the word with a dismissive wave of her hand, “have all been revealed, making you the subject of disgrace and criticism.”

It was just as Marianne had feared. They couldn’t bear to have their name tainted with her failures, so they had to come remind her to her face. “I apologize for disappointing you, Mother.”

“It’s your husband who requires your apology; else he wouldn’t have complained to his grandfather. When the old man wrote to us, he expressed his regrets quite clearly and explained how you do not meet his expectations.”

It wasn’t the talk of Grandfather that had turned Marianne’s stomach sour but the mention of Thomas. Had he complained? Sought out his grandfather’s counsel after finding himself disappointed with his wife? Even after he’d taken her to his bed, was she still not enough?

Marianne was unable to speak for the thick emotion in her throat, no matter how many times she swallowed.

“You simply can’t do anything right, no matter how many masters we hired, or teachers, or doctors. We hoped too much of you, thinking this marriage would be the solution to our problems. Instead, we’ve been summoned to retrieve you.”

Eyes welling with tears, Marianne finally looked up and met the indignant stare of her mother. “What?”

“The elder Mr. Ramsbury assured us that the marriage would be annulled, and you would no longer be welcome here, so we’ve come to collect you and your things, that you may at least attempt to leave with some dignity.”

Marianne shook her head. Leave Primrose House? Leave Thomas? Mrs. Bamber, Collins, Eliza? The music room, the countryside… there were too many things she was unable to give up.

Wiping away the stray tears that blinked out of her eye, Marianne sniffed and lifted her head. “I’m not going anywhere with you.”

Mother scoffed. “Mr. Taylor, please do something. Your daughter is being rather unreasonable. Already with these insufferable tears.”

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