Page 265 of The Long Way Home

I straighten up a bit. “We could make one right now.”

He gives me a gentle smile and shakes his head.

I nod once then move my hand away from his, placing it in my lap and his shoulders fall.

“You don’t want me to, Parks—” He shakes his head. “That’s not how you want me.”

“I just want you, Beej.” I shrug. “But my wanting you has never really been the question.”

“Has it not?” he fires back and I sigh and stand up and start to walk out of the room.

“Off to find Jules then?” he calls after me.

“So what if I am?” I spin on my foot.

“You’re so fucking predictable—” He looks away. “We fight for a second and you run off to someone else.”

“Well, what would you have me do?” I ask, my voice a bit shaky.

“Stay, Parks!” he says loudly. “Just fucking stay.”

I stare over at him and he over at me and it’s like we’re both lost at sea on different pieces of driftwood and the tide is pulling us in different directions.

“I’m back,” Jordan announces from behind me.

I turn around quickly to face her, flashing a smile.

“Oh, hi.” I quickly wipe a tear away.

She frowns a bit, glancing from me over to BJ and then back to me.

“Are you okay?” she asks, tilting her head confused.

“Yeah—” I shrug quickly. “Just, a polar bear died.”

“Oh.” She looks sad about that. “How?”

I purse my lips. “Drowned. It was far out in the ocean. It couldn’t make it…” BJ stares over at me, eyes heavy. “I’m going to go upstairs and pack.”

I hear Jordan say as I walk away, “Wow. She’s really into polar bears.”

---