Page 106 of The Two of Us

Alima grins. “She made sure I knew how she wanted to be buried too. I think she told everyone.”

My laugh deepens. “That sounds like her.”

“Go. Go rest under her for a little while,” Alima says, placing a palm on my back, giving me a gentle push.

As I stand under the maple tree, the sunset becomes an explosion of gold. I sink to my knees and graze my fingers over the flat headstone.

Catherine Marie King

Jan. 13, 1995 - May 13, 2013

Our beloved daughter, sister, and best friend

May we always look forward to tomorrow like you

I trace the indentation of the words best friend repeatedly. It’s a small gift, one I’m not even sure Alima knows she gave me.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get here, Gilly,” I whisper.

When I stopped by the store before driving to Alima’s house, I didn’t think I’d be able to have this moment in front of Cat. I stand up and pull the Snickers bar from my jacket pocket. I peel back the wrapper and take a huge bite, choking out a laugh.

“A Snickers bar in your honor. Are you happy?” I laugh harder when I remember the other part of the request Cat made when we were thirteen. I don’t allow myself to ruminate on the fact that Alima could be watching as I start swaying my hips with abandon. I move my arms to the invisible beat, dancing to the song playing in my head.

“Well, I heard about the fellow you’ve been dancin’ with all over the neighborhood…” I sing.

I only get to the third line before I bend over at the waist, clutching my side from the laughter.

“Okay, that’s enough,” I gasp between laughs. “Your mom’s going to think I’ve lost it.”

I can picture it. Cat smiling down or up or around at me from wherever she is.

“I love you, Gilly.” I wipe at my eyes. “I’ll come back again real soon.”

It’s a promise I don’t intend on breaking. I turn to head back to the house when a myriad of colorful fractals dance over my body. I glance above me and gasp. Hanging from a low branch is the suncatcher I got for Cat when I was in Paris. It sways in the wind, painting the ground in Technicolor and my heart soars. It’s the best place my gift could have ended up. I grin and tap the cat-shaped suncatcher with my finger, watching it sway in the light.

“Bye, Kitty Cat.”

***

I’m sitting in Ambrose’s den, counting down the minutes until he’s supposed to get home. When Anya offered to lend me her copied key so I could surprise him, it sounded like a good idea. But now that I’m here, my nerves are getting the best of me. I should have called first.

The front door’s handle jiggles and I stand up, smoothing out the creases in my skirt from sitting so long. Ambrose is typing something on his phone as he walks into the den, so he doesn’t see me immediately. When I clear my throat, he jumps back, startled.

“Oh, fuck! Fuck. Mara, you scared the shit out of me.”

I flinch from embarrassment. “Sorry.”

His breathing evens as he walks slowly toward me. “What are you doing here?”

I begin pacing the room, trying to garner courage from the carpet to my feet like static electricity.

“I have some things I need to say to you. So, you just… you stand right there.”

Ambrose’s eyebrows lift in surprise, but the corner of his mouth twitches. “Okay.”

I face him full on. “I’m not perfectly healed. I’m not sure that I ever will be. What happened to me, what happened to us… it was life changing. We’re changed forever, whether we like it or not. But what I’ve learned is that… that’s okay. Because the changed version of me still loves the changed version of you. I’m in lovewith you, Ambrose.” I take a step closer, my voice shaking. “I’ve loved you since the moment I knocked on your door with that godforsaken cat in my arms.” My eyes water as I repeat his words. “I loved you then and I love you now.”

Ambrose’s eyes are glassy, but he doesn’t speak and I begin to sweat. His eyes drop to the vase in my hands. “What’s that?”