Page 27 of Vengeance Becomes Her

She avoided his gaze, fidgeting with the sword in her hand. “Why are you asking that now?”

He didn’t reply.

“Jade said something, didn’t she?” Her gaze snapped to his. She needed to know if he’d lie to her.

“She did. Why didn’t you?” His voice was hard but his eyes were gentle.

“Would you have helped me if I did?” She searched his features for something—doubt, malice, anger—she wasn’t sure.

“Honestly, I don’t know.” Tristain shrugged. “I don’t think it’s a good idea and I don’t think it’ll help you.” He held up a hand when Rhiannon opened her mouth to object. “But I’ll do what I can to prepare you if this is what you truly think you need to do.”

“I do.” Tension rolled through her. She could tell there was more he wanted to say. “You don’t think I can makeit out there?”

“Traveling the way I do is difficult and dangerous. It’ll be cold, colder than anything you’ve ever experienced here, and we’ll be sleeping outside in between towns, and you won’t always be able to have a decent meal. Is that something you really want to subject yourself to when you could get back to living your old life here with the people who care about you?”

She crossed her arms over her chest. She knew it was coming, but she was still disappointed. “There’s no going back to the life I had before Silas. I’m not the same person. The only way I might find my way back to myself is if I know he can’t hurt me or anyone else.”

He ran a hand through his sweat-slicked curls. “Rhiannon, I understand your motivations, but we don’t know what he’s capable of. I can’t promise that he’s something you’ll survive a second time.”

“I understand plenty what he’s capable of. I’ve seen what he’s capable of and so have you. There are fates worse than death. It’s not living if you’re constantly looking over your shoulder or so filled with worry and guilt that you can’t sleep at night. I won’t live that way. I’m not asking your permission to come with you. If you won’t let me travel with you, I’ll make my own way.”

He locked eyes with her, concern was etched into every feature. She knew his protests were over concern for her, but she wouldn’t change course to placate the fears of others.

“I’ll help you train but I do hope that you’ll change your mind before I leave.”

“I won’t.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. She was wearing hispatience down.

“Maybe we should just call it a day.” The frustration was thick in his voice.

She wasn’t used to Tristain being the one in a mood. The fear of him giving up on her pushedher to concede.

“I’m sorry. I know I can be…difficult.” She ran her foot over a patch of grass on the ground, tearing a few blades loose.

He gave her a small tight smile. “Go again.”

They ran a few more drills in silence, but they were both tense and awkward. After several miserable minutes, Tristain ended the lesson, citing a headache as his excuse.

Rhiannon’s gut was churning by the time she got back home, feeling guilty and selfish for making him face a constant uphill battle when it came to her.

She spent the rest of the evening punishing herself in solitude, the entire time her mind was consumed by thoughts of Tristain giving up on her and deciding she wasn’t worth the effort.

She told herself it wasn’t because she cared about what he thought about her, but that her disappointment stemmed from the risk of losing her only source of gaining the skills she needed togo after Silas.

Getting out of bed the next day had been pure misery. Her legs were resistant as she tried to stand and her arms roared at her as she balanced herself by bracing a hand on the wall. On her short walk to the washroom, she noticed an envelope in front of the door that someone had slid through the small opening under the frame. She walked over, bending slowly to pick it up, it had taken all her strength to stand back up as her thighs screamed in protest.When she opened it, there was a note inside.

Rhiannon,

I have to tend to some personal errands, take the day off and get some rest. You’ll need it for our next lesson.T.

She rolled her eyes. She knew she’d gotten under his skin yesterday, but she hadn’t realized it was enough that he’d need distance from her. Maybe it wasn’t that, but it seemed like too much of a coincidence to not be related.

She spent her rest day doing as he had recommended, barely getting out of bed other than to take care of her base needs. She lost herself in a book for the majority of the afternoon, exploring a fantasy land, her current worries far from her mind. It wasn’t until the sun went down that she realized she hadn’t moved—or possibly even blinked—in hours.

Rhiannon threw on a simple dress and decided to head to the main house for dinner. Her newly revived appetite wouldn’t let her go to bed without doing so. Dinner was uneventful without Tristain there to banter with across the table and it bothered her more than she wanted to admit that she missed his smilebeaming at her.

She would begrudgingly attempt to make amends tomorrow. She couldn’t risk losing her instructor, not when they were just starting to makereal progress.

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