“And yet you’re here.”
“It’s not rocket science or even psychology.” She held his gaze, her blue-greens penetrating.
That she knew him so well scared him.
“After what’s happened, if you weren’t with your dad, then you’d be here, your favorite place to be with him.”
“That’s right.” Erin remembered. She knew him too well. A big emotional knot lodged in his throat. He wouldn’t be able to speak until he steadied his emotions.
He moved closer to the river, close enough to stick a foot in if he wanted, and Erin stayed near him. Strange how her presence here disturbed him in some ways and soothed him in others. His dad’s shooting had scrambled Nathan’s brain more than he thought.
“Look,” she said. “I should probably go. You need time alone. I just ... I came to make sure you’re all right.”
As in that he wasn’t going to try anything like her mother had. He would ask how Celia was doing, but that seemed like an inappropriate response to her comment.
“And also find me for Jack and Terra.”
She chuckled. “True. I’m not going to lie.”
Erin stepped from the riverbank and started for the trailhead.
“Wait,” he said.
She turned around, her eyes taking him in as if gauging his condition. But something more, something deeply personal, flashed behind her gaze. “What is it?” She took one step toward him. “I’m here to listen if you need to talk.”
“I thought you weren’t that kind of psychologist.”
“I’m not.” A soft smile emerged. “But I’m here to listen anyway.”
She didn’t add “as a friend.” And for some reason, he was kind of glad.
“Then stay, because I do need to talk, after all.”
“Okay, then.”
Nathan eased onto a big, flat boulder, and Erin sat on the other side. He eyed the thunderhead that looked to pass them to the west. Good. He needed this moment. The evidence techs didn’t take long to look over everything because a rain shower had come in the night, and they’d had to work quickly, including up in the area from where the shot must have been fired. Fine with him. It would give him more time to look around here and think. Decide if he was going to go against his own rule book, which gave no instructions for situations such as the one his dad had placed him in.
God, help me. He couldn’t figure this out on his own. He needed an outside perspective, and yet the simple act of telling someone else would be blowing it. But his gut told him that Dad was onto something that was not going to get solved. Or was he simply justifying his own wants and needs? His own actions, should he actually go forward.
Nathan squeezed his eyes shut, opened them again, and took a deep breath. “I need to tell you something. I’ve been asked not to speak to anyone at all. But I don’t know what I’m doing. Erin, I need help.”
The way she looked at him—
“Not therapy. Not that kind of help.” Well, yes, maybe. “My father put me in a difficult situation. He asked me not to tell anyone. That lives are at stake.”
“And you want me to advise you on this?” Erin watched him.
“He said I was the only one he trusted. The problem is that it’s connected to his shooting. If I keep it to myself, then I’m edging close to withholding evidence and possibly obstructing justice, but I don’t know that yet. I do know that Dad made it sound like he was afraid to even trust his own people.”
Erin blew out a long breath. “I understand about keeping some pieces of truth under wraps. There can be a purpose behind it.”
That surprised him. “You do?”
She nodded. “Did you mention any of this to Sheriff Gibson?”
“Only that Dad had told me things he didn’t want me sharing. In a way, I offered up to Henry that I knew something and asked what I should do. Henry told me to listen to my gut.”
“Well, then there you go. He isn’t forcing you to tell him. He trusts you that much.”