Page 5 of Cold

"And give me the stuffed animal. I'm going to wash it too."

My heart raced and I gripped Mr. Whiskers tightly. I shook my head hard. No, I couldn't let go of him! Mr. Whiskers was the only thing that kept me calm. Don't take it, please.

"Give it here, boy."

Tears pricked my eyes. "Please," I begged. "I won't talk anymore, I swear. Don't take him away from me. I-I need him." My breathing quickened as the ache in my chest grew and my vision began to tunnel. "I'll be a good boy. Let me keep him. Please, let me keep him!"

"Alright, alright," Vito said, and I realized his hands were on my arms. "Breathe. You're going to have a damn panic attack."

Too late.

The dizziness had set in and the room reeled. My stomach twisted and if there was anything on my stomach I would have puked. Tremors passed through my body and I couldn't stop the shaking.

I couldn't live without Mr. Whiskers. Not when I'd just gotten him back. He'd been sitting on the dresser for a week since Sergei took him away from me. It drove me crazy not to hold him that entire time. Mr. Whiskers was all I had left that was mine.

"Hey, focus," Vito growled. He grabbed my chin. "Look at me. Breathe!"

I stared at him and concentrated. Vito's emerald green eyes bore into mine. I reached out and held onto his arm as I sucked in a breath and blew it out slowly.

"Again," he ordered.

I closed my eyes and did it again. And again. Vito's firm voice and tight grip grounded me, and when I opened my eyes again, I was back to normal. Or as normal as I usually was. I stared up at him in awe. No one had been able to calm my panic attacks. Sergei usually gave me a pill and I would work it out from there.

"Are you alright?" Vito asked.

I nodded. "Yes," I whispered. "Thank you. Please, don't take Mr. Whiskers. I can't handle that."

Vito sighed. "I can see that." He straightened up and nodded toward the tub. "Fine, take your bath. I'm going to get you clothes."

"Thank you."

I stared after him until he was gone. "He's weird," I whispered to Mr. Whiskers. I put my kitty on the closed toilet lid and turned to the tub. When I climbed in, hot water swirled around my ankles and drew a sigh from my lips. I sank into the water and leaned against the back of the tub. "This is nice."

My body relaxed and I gave into it. There was nothing I could do right now. Sergei’s words swirled in my head and I instantly tensed.

I want you to kill every Bianchi you can get your hands on. That old man, Amadeo, his brothers; all of them. Once you're done, I'll come back and get you.

Shivering, I grabbed a loofah and ran it over my skin. If he says he's coming back, he's coming back. I had to do my job, keep a straight face, and not freak out anymore. Sergei would be angry if I messed up.

I already missed him. What if he left me here permanently?

"Here." Vito came and put clothes on the edge of the sink. "Get dressed and then we need to have a discussion."

I stared at him wearily. "What kind of discussion?"

"Let's start with Sergei and everything you know about him, hmm? You've been with him since you were sixteen. That's six long years to be under someone and not know anything about them. So, if you want to stay out of his hands, you'll give me what I need."

No, I can't do that. If Sergei finds out I gave away important secrets, he will kick my ass.

I wished I was still holding Mr. Whiskers. Avoiding eye contact with Vito, I went back to washing up. I grabbed a bar of soap and lathered up the loofah before I ran it over my skin. Suds covered my flesh and I swiped a finger through them before I blew. Bubbles landed in the water and I smiled.

I don’t want to think about Sergei. Or this man that scares the hell out of me. Or anything. Why can’t I go back to living in my own little world where everything is safe and I am in control? At least there no one can hurt me.

When I glanced up, I blinked at Vito. He stared at me, his eyes tracking every movement I made. My lips curled up into a smile. I have to leave that childish stuff alone while I'm here. Vito can be seduced and then I can go home to Sergei.

Instead of letting him know that I knew he was watching, I parted my legs and worked the soap over my cock. My body was trained to react to every sensation that was given to me so of course my erection grew without much prodding. I gazed up at Vito and our eyes met. The look of lust in his eyes fizzled out and was replaced with irritation as he turned away from me.

"Hurry up."

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