Page 34 of Cold

“If he says he doesn't know then he doesn’t know,” Vito cut in.

Ama narrowed his eyes at Vito before he looked at me again. “Fine. Why did our search for Andrei lead to Sergei?”

That I knew the answer to. I quickly turned back to the stove and moved as I tried to juggle my thoughts. It was one thing to want to live my fantasy life and another to betray Sergei and his family. If I did that, I might as well paint a giant target on my back and wait to get killed. And even if he didn’t slaughter me? I would have to live with the guilt of ratting him out.

“Romare,” Amadeo called. “Talk to me.”

“I can’t,” I whispered. “If I tell you, then it’ll cause trouble.”

“No offense, but if you don’t tell me, then I’ll cause you problems,” Amadeo said, his eyes dark as he glared at me. “This is a matter of life and death. I don’t have time for being pleasant.”

“Don’t talk to him like that,” Vito snapped. “You’re just going to scare him.”

“Everyone’s way too tense,” Six sighed as he grabbed himself a cup of coffee. He patted Vito on the shoulder. “Breathe, Vito.”

When Vito didn’t push his hand off, I glared at Six. The corners of my vision turned red and I imagined slicing him up into tiny little pieces for touching what was mine. I took a step forward.

“Stop.”

Six’s eyes widened. “Um stop what?”

“Stop touching him.”

“Hey, hey,” Vito turned and grabbed my wrist. “Give me the knife. When did you even pick that up?” He sighed and took the blade away from me. “Six, go sit down. And Romare, cook. Or you can go to your room.”

“No!” I said quickly. “Don’t make me go. Please!”

“Then you need to answer Amadeo’s questions,” he snapped. He grabbed my chin and held it in place. There was no one else in the room at that moment, just me and Vito. “Tell him!”

I jumped, my chest rising and falling quickly as I turned to Amadeo. “Sergei’s brother is Andrei. Andrei Ivanov. I don’t know where either of them are. And I’ve only met Andrei a few times. But there are lots of Ivanov’s. Brothers, cousins, uncles, sisters, aunts. I’ve met a ton of them, okay? Is that what you want?” My lip trembled. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore!”

My head pounded and I choked back the sob that threatened to spill. Vito tugged me into his arms. As he held me tightly, I let loose a torrent of tears. He squeezed me harder and I held onto Vito for dear life.

I had just sold out the man that had cared for me, looked after me, loved me. The one that tortured me.

“I want to go to bed,” I choked out.

“Alright,” Vito whispered. “Alright.” He pushed his fingers into my hair and kept my face pressed against his body. “I’m going to get him into bed and then I’ll be back out to talk about this. Give me twenty minutes or so.”

“Okay,” Amadeo said. “Romare, I’m sorry if this brings up bad memories. That’s not my intention.”

I couldn’t speak to him. All of my words were snatched from my throat and all I could do was cling to Vito. We moved and I stepped backward carefully before I heard the drawers opening one after the other. Finally, Vito pulled out my pacifier and pressed it into my mouth. I tried to shove it out with my tongue as my face burned and embarrassment blanketed me. But Vito pushed it back in.

And I gave in.

Without looking at anyone in the room, I let Vito guide me out.

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