Page 20 of The Duke's Lesson in Love

Lord Gilleasbuig pulled out her chair, and she trembled when her back brushed against his knuckles as they lingered on the top rail. Her teeth clenched. Was he determined to make her stay wretched? To have her spend her days with nothing but him occupying her mind.

“Does this chair suit?” he whispered above her ear, his breath feathering the stray hairs. Then to Edwin. “This is the proper way to seat a lady.”

Sadie swallowed. She had no doubt he noticed the rise and fall of her chest.

The sweet, woodsy aroma from his drink tickled her nose as she inhaled, reminding her of the first time she smelled liquor on his breath. Except for the night he’d flung her from his bed, the remainder of their journey she saw him drink nothing stronger than wine. Even then, he limited himself to a single glass.

The food arrived the moment he sat at the head of the table. Edwin sat on his left and she sat on his right. Didn’t lords sit at the far end of enormous tables? Yet, he was close enough to stroke her arm with his fingertips… take her hand in his—

“Wine, Madam?”

She flushed. The butler’s question ended her wayward barrage of thoughts. “Yes, thank you Mr. Hodgkin.”

“Just Hodgkin, Miss.”

She nodded, not sure what else to say.

“Top up my brandy too, will you Hodgkin?”

The butler stilled, his forehead wrinkling before he offered, “Of course, Your Grace.”

Hodgkin’s surprised pause confirmed her suspicions that his lordship was not a regular drinker.

Meals were never a grand affair at the orphanage. She was uncomfortable and out of place in this imposing setting. She knew of dinnerware and placement, and many other basics from working in the household her parents had served. But she realized with defeat that she was ill-equipped to be the child’s governess. Taking the role had been nothing more than an opportunity to remain close to Edwin. But was doing so a disservice to the child? Didn’t she want the best for him even if that meant at someone else’s hand?

“Perhaps,” she said when Hodgkin left them to eat their meal. “I should take my meal with the servants.”

She moved to stand, but he stilled her retreat by covering her hand with his and discreetly traced circles on her skin. She stared at their complexions—highlighting yet another reason their difference in station made the yearning in her heart impossible.

“You will remain here,” he spoke softly, and her eyes flashed to Edwin, but the boy was engrossed in his meal. “How else am I to judge how effective you are at your lessons?”

She gritted her teeth, resisting the urge to snatch her hand away. She would not show how much he affected her. But good gosh, she was burning.

During their carriage ride as they shared the basket of food, she took the opportunity to teach the child which cutlery to use for which portions of the meal and she was glad to see he remembered. “Perhaps a better suited governess is in order. One who is familiar with all the skills the son of a Duke needs, one who is strict and…”

He fisted his hand around his fork and she knew he didn’t care for the word “strict” any more than she did.

“Strictness without a gentle hand to balance is crippling to a child, especially one who is sheltered. Take it from someone who knows.”

She stared at him, but he did not give any more glimpses of his past. “I will try my very best, Your Grace.” Her hand curled in her lap to stop the tingling from racing up her arm.

“Make a list of skills you have. I will hire tutors to compensate for his other lessons.”

She nodded. Until now, she had been content in her choice of employment. She loved the children and had resigned herself to never having children of her own. At five and twenty, she was kissed once, and that had never exhilarated her senses the way a single touch from Lord Gilleasbuig did.

Now she wished she could offer Edwin more than affection and the love for stories. She wished she could… Sadie stopped the thought before it formed. He had a father and that was better than most orphans received. “Do you think you shall marry, Your Grace?”

“Why do you ask Miss Fields? Do you have a lady in mind?”

Sadie choked. He was determined to keep her flustered. “I was thinking of Edwin.”

He set his cutlery down. “You would be agreeable to Edwin calling another woman mother?”

She stared at her food. While that would break her heart, Edwin’s happiness was all that mattered.

“I see.” His brows wrinkled. “Edwin, what say you, would you like to have a mother?”

The child peered between them. “Mamon Sadie is my mother.”

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