Page 29 of A Disaster in Three Acts

“It was assault, so it better be.” He takes a deep breath and then looks over the crowd to where the winners are congregating. I’m sure someone is going to track down Holden for some kind of loser closure speech for the web series. “But how would I even—”

I latch onto his arm and start marching him into the crowd and don’t stop pushing until I’m standing face-to-face with the lady who led us off the track a moment ago.

“Your number two, that guy with the spiky hair and ugly shirt, is a real number two. He hit my friend in the head with his squirt gun while the race was happening.”

She raises a pencil-thin eyebrow behind her glasses. “Excuse me?”

“I was filming. You can clearly see for yourself that he was hit over the head and then rammed off the track. That’s not okay. Did your rules account for people physically attacking each other with anything other than confetti, water, and plushies?” I cock my head to the side, waiting. Holden stands next to me, silent. Would it kill him to help me out here? This benefits him, too.

The woman taps her foot for a second, looking between us with a tight grimace. “Cue up the footage.”

I navigate back and back and back, stop rewinding, and let the action play out for Holden and her to see. It’s perfectly clear that the guy hit him and then shoved him off the track.

“So?” I ask, holding my breath.

She sighs, then pulls a walkie-talkie from her belt. “John, we have an issue with one of the winners.”

Holden and I spend an hour after the event waiting for and then talking to Vice and Virtual representatives, showing them the footage, showing The Douche the footage. He gets disqualified and his win handed over to Holden since Holden was in second place when turning the last corner and would haveeasily made the top five. I film everything, from Vice and Virtual telling the crowd they’re naming a new winner because of foul play—I bet they’ll love putting this part in their little web series—to the end of the night when mostly everyone has disappeared and Holden claims his spot on the winners’ platform, atop the big number two.

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