Page 66 of Seeking Hades' Ember

Chapter 32

Ember

I felt so confused. My heart was telling me what Hades was feeling. It was the strangest thing. Without even looking into his actions, I could feel the internal struggle he was having. I wasn't sure if it was the bond that we shared or something different entirely. I wasn't an expert, and Hades wasn't either. His mouth was telling me one thing, but it was his aura telling me another.

He was feeling inadequate for sure; any man would if he couldn't give someone he loved a child, but there was an overwhelming feeling of guilt and regret tied along with it. The emotion was building with each passing second as we sat there in silence as I ran my fingers through his hair. Trying to be calm and not prying too much, I pulled his mouth towards mine and kissed him lightly.

"Tell me what is wrong, Hades? I thought we were supposed to be in this together?" Hades closed his eyes and heaved a heavy sigh as his head went straight for my lap. Sitting up, I rubbed his bareback, which was full of ridges of muscle and tanned skin. My heart skipped a beat, and my mind started drifting elsewhere. Hades was noticing my reaction, but I coughed to break it.

"No secrets, Hades, I feel guilt all over you, and I know it isn't about the baby thing." I talked more sternly. Hades stiffened and stopped stroking his thumb on my thigh.

"How would you know?" he accused but not in such a manner of throwing it in my face. His expression was of pure interest.

"I feel it, in here." I pointed to my heart. "I feel your guilt weigh on you like bricks. It is like part of me is feeling something that isn't mine," I trailed off. "Is it the bond?" Hades sat up on his forearms and kissed the top of my thigh.

"Part of it? It shouldn't be so strong," he mused. "You know it isn't your feeling?" I nodded. What would I have to feel guilty about anyway?

"It's like I can just look at you, and when I take in your eyes, I feel the overwhelming feeling of guilt and fear." Hades' breath caught as he sat up in the bed and put his legs over the side. His hands immediately went to his face.

"I do have guilt, and I am afraid," he stated. "It is strange you can feel it so strongly since we aren't bonded but we are a different of a human and a god being together," he chuckled. "Anyway, there is something I need to tell you."

I scooted closer to him as I pulled the bed sheet around me. "Then tell me," I whispered while putting my cheek to his shoulder. Hades growled out in frustration and pulled his hair.

"I can't," he breathed. "I'm too afraid you will leave." Letting out a breath, he stood up in his completely naked form. His butt was nothing but muscle and I could see the indentions and smooth lines that covered him. My heart caught up in my throat, and I couldn’t swallow. Looking away, concentrating on the carpet, I forced down the spit in my mouth.

"Hades, I told you I wouldn't leave. I'm scared you will leave me. I'm not that much of a-" I was stopped by Hades smashing his lips to mine. It was rough but ended gently as he continued to peck my lips.

"You are my everything," he whispered in my mouth. "Don't think anything else otherwise." I nodded. I pulled him in for one more kiss.

"All right, I'll tell you." Hades walked away and put on a pair of black joggers; thank heavens because he was way too distracting. Sitting his knees on the floor in front of me, he held my hands; he closed his eyes and looked into mine.

"Do you remember the masked gladiator that took you from your home?" My heart stopped, and Hades squeezed my hands tight.

"No, no, you wouldn't." The tears were pooling. Hades would never do such a thing; he would never take a young girl and sell her off. Hades started shaking his head.

"I didn't do it; someone stole that helmet from me. It is my helmet, but I swear to you it was stolen. You can ask any of our friends. I swear to you, I didn't take you. You have to believe me." Hades' head rested in my lap as my heart continued to be at a standstill.

I felt the honesty, and guilt that rode his heart like an earthquake was slowly fading. In my mind, I felt a small whisper as I concentrated, and the breath of wind spoke, "Truth, he's telling the truth."It was the same voice that spoke my name just a week ago.

"Who are you?" I tried to ask, only to hear Hades' sob. My heart broke in an instant. The King of the Underworld was crying into my lap."I'm not leaving," I whispered as I continued to pet him. Hades gripped my thighs tighter like I was going to float away and never return. It was tight enough to form bruises, but I said nothing; if he needed security, I would give it to him.

The helmet, the bane of my existence, and the object that haunted my dreams was something that Hades owned. Many nights I cursed the helmet, but it should have been the man behind it. I saw nothing but the object that hid the villain from the world. The coward that couldn't show his face."Is the helmet still out there?" I gulped, and Hades' dark eyes met mine.

"I had it, the night we took you from the club. It was in my possession, and now it is gone again. When Malachi escaped, he took it." My mouth was set open as a tiny squeak fell out.

"Was it M-Malachi who took me?" My hands fell into a ball, tightening my hands around each other. My breath became quick and lean, and Hades immediately sat down on the bed and pulled me to his chest.

"They will pay. They will pay dearly." The voice was dark and almost made me feel scared. The once crying god was now angered as he held me. Feeling the revenge and hate in his heart, I knew he would protect me. "I will make sure they suffer a fate worse than death and torture. He will face the Titans and their hunger for violence. He will spawn over and over and deal with the pain you and many other women had to endure a thousand times over."

My breathing slowed, feeling the warmth from his chest. "I swear to you. I will get the helmet back. I will fight for you and my mistake." A hint of guilt crossed his heart, but it faded far too quickly to read it. The bond was a strange thing. One minute overwhelming emotions came from him, and it was gone just as quickly. Hades' chest continued to rise and fall as we sat in each other's presence. My finger trailed around his chest tattoo, and his skin shivered.

Earlier, he gave me the greatest pleasure I had ever felt, and it felt even more amazing that he did it. His hands, his tongue, the way he spoke to me took me places in my mind and body I wanted to explore more. I didn't want to seem overly greedy, but after our talk about him giving up one of his dark secrets he held from me, even though he shouldn't have, it made me want to share more of myself.

"So, you aren't mad at me?" He kissed my forehead.

"No, you had no control over Malachi, who stole something from you. You had no way to prevent it! I just hope I don't see it again; will you destroy it when you get it back?" Anything that led back to him and caused me discomfort he would be upset over.

"Anything for you."

---