Page 55 of Inevitable Destruction

Let’s just say, neither one of us had the slightest fucking clue what we were doing at just fourteen.

But we experimented, and were each other’s firsts for everything—until he moved summer break after Freshman year, and I never heard from him again.That was the last time I was even remotely close with anyone aside from my Pops—until Jamie.

I grind my teeth until the familiar locking and popping noise fills the static in my head. That amplified by the wind whipping past my ears fills the not so quiet silence.

My thoughts lean in a dangerous direction as I take a curve on the winding road. I refuse to think about how fucked up this is, how I’m going to hell, that I’m the worst kind of person, none of that.Because this is what’s necessary, and sometimes what’s necessary is pure fucking evil and morally wrong in every way that counts.

I think I used to be a good man. Maybe. But now? After doing something like this? I know that can no longer be true, but at least I’m doing what’s right. This is what my Pops deserves. After everything that family did to him, the worst of it being them taking his fucking life, I have no choice.

He gave up his entire life for me after my biological mother split. He could’ve run, too, but he didn’t. He chose me and raised me all on his own, with very little help. I didn’t grow up with a lot, but I couldn’t care less about that. I was happy, and whenever I was around Pops, he was, too.

I know now that he must’ve had some really bad fucking days, but he never let me see it. He never let me see his struggles, and instead, he only showed me love and happiness. For that, I will forever be grateful. Which is why I owe him this, at least.

I swallow the lump that has formed in my throat at the thought of him, his weathered face flitting through my mind. We look similar, though not as much as I would like. He always used to tell me I had a lot of my mother in me, which I hated. I didn’t want to look anything like her, but what can you do? Genetics.

Maybe that’s why I’ve turned into this hateful, spiteful fucking man. I know for a fact I didn’t get it from Pops. He was as kind and gentle as they come. Must’ve gotten it from my cunt of a mother.

Or maybe I’ve become this cruel man because my fucking father was killed by his best friend.

The wind picks up, and I press the throttle at the threat of another storm looming in the distance. The thick, rolling clouds are still visible with the sun sinking on the horizon. It’s a weird concept that it can rain, while more clouds roll in, darker and more threatening, but that’s the norm around here. And it’s not exactly practical to ride a motorcycle every day, but most of the time, I don’t mind the rain stabbing my face like tiny little pin needles. Only right now, I speed through, desperate to get home and go to fucking sleep. My thoughts are churning a million miles a minute.

After narrowly missing the storm chasing me, I pull up outside of my house, only to see a shadowed figure sitting on my front steps. My brows tug together in confusion, and it’s not until I’m rolling to a stop that I realize who it is.

After I switch the ignition off, I kick the stand down, and climb off the bike. “What the fuck are you doing here, Seth?”

“I haven’t seen you in days, Rhett. You’ve been more distant than usual, which is really saying something. I’m worried about you.” His voice flits through the air, meek and unsure, but insistent.His hands are folded in his lap, and even though he’s staring over at me as I walk toward him, he doesn’t move.

I snort and lift a brow in annoyance before I trudge up the steps right past him. “And? The fuck’s it to you?”

“Wait, what?” Seth gracefully hops to his feet and comes up behind me as I shove my key in the deadbolt. “What does that even mean?”

I turn around with an exasperated sigh. Rubbing my eyes with my index finger and thumb, I say “There isn’t anything I do that you need to be concerned with, Seth. We fuck sometimes, and that’s about it. Or did you seem to forget that?” I narrow my eyes, and he visibly shrinks away, his shoulders hunching.

“I-I thought…” I watch his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows. “Are you breaking up with me?” He lowers his voice to a quiet whisper and lets his head hang between his shoulders. He looks so fucking pathetic; I can’t stand it.

“What the fuck do you mean ‘break up’? We never even started, Seth.”

His eyes dart to mine, filled to the brim with unshed tears. “Are you seeing someone else?”His lower lip quivers, and I bite down on my molars to keep from barking out a laugh. He really does look like a puppy who got kicked. It’s kind of amusing.

“Fucking, yes. Seeing? No. I don’t see anyone.”

“But what about—”

“Not even you,” I cut him off with a sharp bite. His gaping mouth snaps closed, and with that, he crosses his arms over his chest. Even though I just came in Dominik’s mouth thirty-something minutes ago, and Seth is getting on my every last nerve, I can still admire his small, flexible little body.

“You’ve always just been a fuck to me. You knew that from the beginning, so I really don’t understand why you’re here right now, fucking bugging me at home with this shit.

“I never needed you. I only wanted a tight ass to fuck, and I found a new one, so you can go.” With that, I turn the knob and slam the door behind me, right in Seth’s face. I should feel bad, even just an inkling, but I don’t. He was a means to an end, and honestly, I can’t fucking handle more than Dominik right now. I need my head in the right space, and Seth is just a distraction I don’t need.

I thought I could use him to keep me from wanting to fuck Dominik, but I already figured out that little dilemma—getting both things I want at the same time. I get to scratch the itch of wanting his tight ass while also dismantling him one tiny piece at a time, though he’s already halfway there all on his own.

He’s making it so fucking easy for me, and he has no clue that he’s a willing participant in his own destruction.

With a dry chuckle, I kick off my boots and make my way into the kitchen, flicking on a singular light to guide the way. The storm is raging outside, the rain pelting the glass windows with brutal force.

Seth’s probably stuck in it for all I know, but not one part of me cares. I’m just glad to have him out of the way and no longer fucking clinging to me like static.

I pull open the freezer and grab the bottle of ice-cold Jameson along with a glass from the cupboard. After taking a seat on the barstool, I unscrew the top and pour a generous amount into the glass before setting the bottle off just to the side so I can easily refill it for when I need more—because I know I will.

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