Page 25 of Nanny for the SEALs

“Don’t get embarrassed. You’re only human. We all are. I bet she’s a looker, which is why you got upset that Pete’s taken her out.”

“She has long dark hair and dark eyes, which light up whenever she plays with the twins.” I wasn’t looking at them, but thinking about Katie and drifted for a bit. I came back to reality as I ended with, “She’s nice, sweet and kind.”

“Oh my,” she laughed, “you do have it bad.”

I stood after noticing that not only was Aunt Elizabeth laughing, but Rick was, too.

“I’m not mocking you. I just hate it when you boys fight. It’s been a while since you’ve been that way. Don’t let anyone make you feel that you have to go back to the way things were. Okay?” She winked at me.

I agreed, but I had to leave. I didn’t talk about emotions.

“I know you’re probably finding this a little weird talking to me about it.” She pulled my arm down to make me sit. For some reason, Rick took this as his cue to leave. I envied him for being able to walk out and not say a word, whereas I just sat like a scared little mouse.

“I don’t know why you feel your brothers are always mocking you. Or why you think they don’t like you. You’ve been like this since you guys were little. Always blaming them and making it a ‘them versus you,’ which has never been the case. We hoped when you joined the marines that it would be different, that you would learn to get along better, but if anything it made it worse.”

I nodded because everything she was saying was true. I hated to admit it, but there was no denying that I was jealous of them and I had no reason to be. We looked the same; if I lost a few pounds, then not only would Katie find it hard to tell Rick and Pete apart, but me, too.

“I just want you to know that you’re loved, that’s all, Stan. It’s all your parents and I wanted you to know. You’re loved.”

I felt the same rage wash over me. I thought I’d put it to rest, but her last words woke it up again.

“Oh yeah? If she loved me so much, then why did she leave? Why did Mom leave?”

Her eyes widened. “What? She never left, she killed herself. You know that.”

“Exactly. What kind of mother has three kids and decides to end it all? She’s a monster. No better than the monsters out on the field. Putting guns in kid’s hands and saying it’s all for the good of the country.”

I felt her hot hand slap across my face. The shock of it all made me hold my face.

“I will not have you talk about your mother that way. She wasn’t well; she couldn’t help herself and the only person you can think about is yourself.”

“Maybe the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” I spat back. “She couldn’t think of anyone else but herself. Well, neither can I. It’s all me, me and me. I’m the one who got rid of Bianca. I used Katie after she told me her boyfriend had been cheating on her. The trash guy, Ben, I’ve heard you and Pete talk about. He’s like a snake in the club. Well, he was her ex. She said she needed a job and somewhere to stay, so I fucking decided she could cook and make it look as if I hired her, so that for once in my fucking life, you would treat me as an equal.”

“So, you got some fucking stranger to look after my kids? What the fuck is wrong with you? Why do you hate me so fucking much?” Rick walked toward me. Not to talk, but clearly to hit me.

“Rick! Calm down. It doesn’t matter what Stan did. Katie has been doing a good job and she’s been looking after the twins, right?”

His focus was on Aunt Elizabeth and it was if she was calming him down as his face was going from a bright red to his normal coloring. His breathing was controlled, but I didn’t wait for the confrontation, one I knew I deserved. I shot up and stormed out of there. I checked my pocket and I had my cards. I didn’t know where I was going, but I could hear Aunt Elizabeth sobbing, probably regretting slapping me. I hated to admit, but she did the right thing. I needed someone to slap some sense into me. Now, it was up to me to find some peace. I had to leave here—maybe for a few days, maybe forever. It was all getting too much.

Who fucking knew?

As much as I didn’t want to leave Katie, I knew I had to go.