Page 53 of Concede

Chapter 28

Tanner

Work was busy this afternoon. Maxi added some new specials, so we were slammed. I had to make a quick stop after my shift ended. I bribed Knuckles into driving me across town. I have a surprise planned for Maverick and I made him pinky swear to not tell him. I may have told a harmless lie and said it was from Dani too so he wouldn’t get suspicious. That side of town was a little sketchy but from what I can tell, Lincoln does the best work. Maverick’s birthday is in a few weeks, and I wanted to do something special for him. I say special, it’s just a lighter with an engraving, but I thought it would be a nice gift. I had to let them know exactly what I wanted and drop off the lighter I chose. He said it would be ready by next week, so I made sure Knuckles knew he had to bring me back. He was overly excited.

I walk into the main room. There’s a handful of club members playing pool and drinking beer. I glance over at Widow who stands and motions for me to walk over.

“Prez was looking for you earlier. He seems a little off.” His eyes met mine with a serious expression.

“Okay. Is he upstairs?” I ask

“Yeah, he’s up there.”

I give him a small smile and maneuver past the guys playing pool. As my feet hit each stair my mind is trying to wrap around what could be wrong. I told him I got off at 6:00 and it’s 7:30. I’m sure he’s all out of sorts about that. Like usual.

I drop my purse on my bed and walk to his room. His door is shut, so I knock lightly before twisting the knob and pushing it open.

No.

I suck in a sharp breath when my eyes see what’s happening in front of me. Chasity is relaxed against his headboard, topless. Maverick is sitting at the edge of the bed. Roxy is on her knees in front of him. His eyes shoot open, and he frowns. I slam the door shut and hold my hand to my chest as I stagger away.

This hurts. It really freaking hurts.

I feel like I’m suffocating. I know I said I could handle it. I thought I could handle whatever this is with him. I quickly descend the stairs as tears sting my eyes. I round the banister and my eyes catch Widow's. His brow creases as he watches me jog towards the back door. I need to get out of here. Now. My feet carry me through the damp grass, and towards the dirt path.

I knew better. I knew what kind of life he lived, and I let myself fall. Stupid. I shake my head as unwanted tears shed from my eyes. I don’t want to cry for him. I reach the wooden bench and sit down. My hands clench the edge of the wood as I finally let myself break. He warned me. He told me flat out he can’t be with just me, so why am I so hurt? Why does my heart feel like it isn’t even beating?

My phone dings.

Zeke: where are you?

I don’t answer. I don’t want to talk to him or see him for that matter. I sit here in the dark and think about my future. I know this is not what I want. I don’t want to be with a man who can’t choose me. I almost wish I never even came here. I love getting to be with my brother, but I would do anything right now to avoid this pain. The pain of not being enough. That’s just it with Maverick. I will never be enough. Forty minutes later another text comes through.

Zeke: I swear Tanner. If you don’t tell me where you are I will have every brother in this club hunting your ass down.

I close my eyes. I gave him my virginity last night. Last Freaking Night. He couldn’t even go one damn day? This life isn’t for me. I am not cut out for this bullshit. I don’t know how his mom did it all those years.

The image of Roxy in front of him flashes in my mind again and I clench my chest. I hate this feeling. This was a mistake. Zeke LeBlanc is a mistake. One I damn sure won’t make again.

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