Page 112 of Start A War (Saint View Psychos)

She froze. “Like what just happened with War?”

If getting into a fight was the worst thing that Scythe had ever done, I would have let him out as often as he liked. It would have been a lot easier. A lot less painful. His demands grew by the day, silently eating away at me. “Worse,” I murmured. “That was nothing compared to what he’s capable of.”

Her voice shook, the fear I didn’t want her feeling creeping in. “Tell me. I need to know.”

I didn’t want to say it, but I wouldn’t lie to her. Not ever. “Murder. Mayhem. Violence. Sometimes I can regain control in minutes. But sometimes it takes me years. Like when I was in high school. I barely remember anything from that time. He keeps his memories locked away where I can’t reach them.”

She rubbed the back of her neck, kneading the muscles there. “I really needed a drink for this conversation.”

I stood and grabbed a bottle of vodka from the shelf behind her desk, cracking the top open. I glanced around, but there were no glasses in her office.

She held a hand out. “After everything that just went down? I’ll chug it straight from the bottle. Hand it over.”

I did as I was told.

She took a long swig, wincing as she swallowed, then held it out to me.

I shook my head. “I can’t. Alcohol makes me weak. It’s harder to fight him off.”

“So did he take over tonight? Is that why you attacked War? What about the other night at the ice-cream parlor?”

“That was still me, but his voice was loud in my ear, urging me on. When I do things like that, it’s because he’s trying to take over. If I’m quick enough, I can fight him off.”

“And if you aren’t?”

I shrugged. “Then he wins.”

She bit her lip. “That doesn’t sound like a good thing.”

“It’s not.”

She took another swig from the bottle. “Was it my fault?”

I frowned. “That I have DID?”

“That Scythe pushed through tonight?”

I didn’t say anything.

“Shit, it was, wasn’t it?”

“The doctors say his appearances are triggered by trauma. When something comes up that I can’t deal with, Scythe takes over. Seeing you like that with War…I thought he was hurting you. That hurt me. So Scythe intervened.” I met her gaze. “I clearly owe you an apology.”

She shook her head. “I think I owe you one. I should have told you about War. We’re…”

“In a sexual relationship.”

She blinked. “I…I don’t know. I guess so. I mean, yes, we were having sex tonight, but I don’t know if that’s an ongoing arrangement…” Her cheeks went the prettiest shade of pink when she was embarrassed. “I should have told you.”

“It’s not my business who you sleep with. But perhaps if I’m working, you could just let me know in advance, so I don’t ruin things for you.”

Her mouth pulled into a line. “It is your business. We had a date. And a kiss…”

That kiss had been like nothing I’d ever experienced before. I could still taste her on my lips if I thought hard enough about it. But that didn’t give me the right to dictate who she was intimate with.

Mine.

She grabbed my hand, and Scythe’s voice faded away. “I like you. I want another date. Another kiss. I want more everything. But I just got out of a long-term, very horrible relationship. I just want to live for a little bit. Without restraints.”

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