“Knox, let’s be real. It’s weird in a lot of ways. I mean…did you ever think you’d be eating breakfast with me again?”
“No, but that doesn’t make it weird. I think when you know you’re supposed to be with someone, you find a way back to each other.” He shrugged. “Hopefully we learned from our past mistakes and bring our life experiences to the table and come up with an even better version of us.”
Maddie didn’t look completely convinced. “Do you think we made mistakes?”
Now it was his eyes that went wide. “Uh, yeah. You don’t think the whole telling your parents about how we eloped was a mistake?”
“Well, okay. That, but what about anything else? That one moment isn’t all that defines us, is it?”
That one simple question hit him harder than he imagined.
“I honestly don’t know. When I think about us—back then us—that’s the moment that sort of stands out the most,” he admitted. “I wish it didn’t, but it is the first thing that comes to my mind.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. Believe me, I wish it wasn’t because there are so many more memories I’d rather remember,” he said gruffly, pushing his plate away because his appetite was gone. “I’m not sure how to change that.”
“What if you can’t?” she quietly asked. “What if we create something new and wonderful and that’s the only thing you can think of? Is that going to be something that gets thrown out there when we fight? Is it going to be held against me forever?”
Knox desperately wanted to say no, but…he wasn’t sure.
“I’ve been seeing a therapist for years,” she went on after a minute. “We’ve talked about this. Not how you’re handling it or seeing things, but me and my issues with all of it. Do you think it’s something we need to talk about…together? You know, with a therapist?”
The thought was beyond unappealing to him. It wasn’t that he was against therapy—for other people—it just wasn’t something he wanted to do himself.
Ever.
“I think we’re getting a little ahead of ourselves on this,” he said with a small laugh. “Just because it’s what I’m thinking now or what I’ve thought in the past doesn’t mean it’s going to be that way forever. We’re making new memories and they’re going to be the things I remember the most. Fishing with you? Going to the farmers market? Bancaked? I mean…that’s what I think of more and more.”
Liar, liar, liar…
Maddie’s shoulders seemed to sag with relief. “I like the sound of that. Of making new memories because the ones we’ve made so far have been great.” She gave him a beautiful smile and Knox hoped they could put this negative shit behind them and focus on the future.
And they could address moving in together another time.