Page 60 of Impossible

Chapter Twenty-Six

Riley

It’s Sunday morning and I’m walking through the store trying to find the right baptism card for Harper. Beverly called me last week and told me Harper is getting baptized the following weekend and she wants me to attend. There will be a small party following the mass at Beverly and Frank’s house. I wanted to tell her I was busy. The thought of seeing Liam right now is too terrifying. After his text message a couple weeks ago, I have been a mess. Well, let’s be honest, I’ve been a mess since I lost him.

But it hurt to have him tell me that he missed me. I wanted to tell him how much I missed him too, but I didn’t know where that led us. Were things too complicated for us to move on from? Did we just mess up any chance we had of being in each other’s lives and me being there for Harper?

After I find a card for Harper, I sign it and place it with the gift I got for her, a gold cross with her and Becca’s birthstones on it. I swing by Bent Fork to pick up Becca’s favorite cupcakes. It feels like these special occasions, where I would always bring them for her, still call for her favorites. I’m sure I can get Harper hooked on them one day, just like her mother was.

When I walk into the church, I see Peyton standing in the back holding Harper who is dressed in her white baptismal outfit. I want to go grab Harper and give her the biggest smooch, but I have been dodging Peyton’s attempts to get a hold of me. It feels awkward now. I opt to stand in the corner, waiting for everyone to head to the front and take a seat. I should have come later so I could just slip in.

“You’re not thinking about bailing on us now, are you?” Logan comes up to me, throwing his arm over my shoulders.

“Um, no. Just hanging out until it starts.”

“In the corner by yourself?” he raises his eyebrows at me.

“Well, excuse me for having a little hesitation after my last encounter with your family.”

His head falls back as he laughs, bringing attention to us. I look around and spot Liam in the other corner of the back talking to his other brothers. His eyes darken as he sees Logan’s arm around me as he smiles at my words. I see him excuse himself from his other brothers and begins to stomp our way. Why does he have to look so damn good in his suit? He’s wearing a blue suit with a white shirt and brown belt. When he reaches us, I get a whiff of his cologne and my heart skips a beat. I even miss his scent.

“What’s going on over here?” Liam asks.

Logan pulls me further into his arms. I see Liam’s jaw clench as his fists ball up. “Just talking to your girl. Trying to make her feel more comfortable.”

Liam’s girl. I wish I was still his girl.

“Well, I’ll leave you two lovebirds alone.” Logan walks away with a smug grin on his face. He clearly finds this situation funny.

Liam looks me up and down, his eyes taking in my white dress. He bites his bottom lip, something he always does when he is thinking something dirty.

“Thanks for coming,” he says.

“Of course I came. I wouldn’t miss something like this. I’ve missed Harper,” I admit.

“We’ve both missed you.”

I look over at Harper, smiling at Peyton. I see Beverly and Frank talking with Becca’s parents. Logan and Greyson are laughing about something. I look anywhere but in Liam’s eyes. I can’t risk looking into his eyes while he says things like that to me. Luckily the music begins, and everyone starts to take their seats.

“I’ll see you at my parent’s house after?” he asks, sounding hopeful.

I nod my head and make a quick dash for a seat. Liam joins his family in the front row and takes Harper into his arms. I try to pay attention to the mass, but all I can watch is Liam and Harper. The way they interact. How patient he is with her. How much she looks at him with adoration. Tears begin to well up as I watch the love between the two of them. For a while, I thought I could be part of that circle. I almost need to get up and leave, the pain is so strong. The loss feels so powerful.

Once the mass is over and we all start heading to our cars, I see Peyton lean into James to whisper him something then take off in my direction. As I open my car door, she yells for my attention.

“Riley, wait up!” When she gets to my car, she seems a little nervous. Not something you typically see from her. “Any chance I can catch a ride with you to my parents?”

“Umm, sure. Hop in.”

We settle into the car and remain silent while I back out of the parking space. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to say in this situation, so I remain silent. No one speaks for the first five minutes of the drive, leaving me to wonder why she wanted to drive with me in the first place. Another minute goes by before she finally says something.

“Riley, I owe you a huge apology for my words that night. It was totally out of line. I don’t know what triggered me to react that way. I think...,” she begins to say with a shaky voice, like she is trying to stop herself from crying. “I think it just was another thing there to remind me that Becca is gone. That she’s never coming back. But that’s no excuse. I’m so sorry. I hope you can forgive me.”

I’m surprised by the honesty and sincerity that I hear in her words. It feels almost impossible to not forgive her. I know she was just caught off guard.

“I forgive you. I suppose Liam and I should have handled the way we entered better until everyone knew. And I’m sorry for ignoring your calls. I’ve just been...distracted lately. It’s been a rough month.”

“I hope you know Liam has been a mess since you two stopped talking. I can see this light that you turned on in him is gone. I really hope you two can work things out.”

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