Page 41 of Salvation

His thumb pushes past my barrier, lubricated from my pulsing, dripping, soaked with want pussy. He’s now thrusting into both holes at the same tempo, fucking my pussy and my ass with his thick fingers as he roughly sucks my clit and rakes it with his teeth. He adds another finger to my pussy and increases the tempo. I moan as the fullness from both holes being fingered while he worships my clit sends me into a frenzied state. “Oh, Luke, yes! God, yes! Fill me. You feel so good… Yes!” I feel the wave building inside of me. He bites down on my clit while curling his fingers inside of me just as it crests. Stars explode behind my closed lids as I scream out and my body splinters. “LUKE… Ohhhhh. Baby… Baby… Mmmmmm.”

He continues to gently finger me as my body rides the last waves of my mind-blowing orgasm. My thighs quiver once more, and my legs fall on either side of his kneeled form. He presses a gentle kiss to my saturated folds.

My head rolls to the side and I look at him in the dim light. The streetlights reflecting through the front door cast faint light into the hall. It’s the only light in the room. It’s not completely dark, but you can’t really see anything but shadows and outlines either.

My hand reaches out and cradles Luke’s face. Turning his head, he presses a kiss to my palm before leaning back. I hear him sigh.

With trepidation I ask, “What’s wrong? Luke?”

He sighs again and stands from the floor as I struggle to sit up on the desk. My panties are still on, though they’re bunched to the side. They’re now completely soaked. They feel cold against me.

Luke doesn’t say anything, he just turns toward the door.

I immediately freak out. I call out to him, “Luke? What’s wrong?”

He says something under his breath that I can’t hear, and I quickly stand and cross the room. As I reach his back, I place my hand on it. He jerks beneath my touch, and I let it fall. My chest is in a vice. I brokenly whisper, “What did I do?”

He turns so fast; I scream in alarm. Then his hands are on my arms. He yanks me to him. His arms wrap around me, pulling me flush into his body. My arms go around his waist and I press my face against his chest. I breathe deeply, soaking in the smell of Luke.

His hands tangle in my hair, pulling my head back. I’m looking at him and can barely make out his features in the dark. Leaning down, he presses a kiss to my mouth. His lips cling to mine. The kiss starts slow, but soon his mouth is devouring mine. I’m just letting him consume me.

I have no idea what’s going on.

He breaks the kiss and takes a deep breath before harshly saying, “I love you. I fucking love you, Hope. I love you so much. It kills me at times how much I love you.

“I want you. I want you more than I want anything in this world. But I know that you are fucking Gabrial. I know that he sinks inside your body and loses himself while making you scream.

“I know this.

“And that kills me…” His voice tapers off and my heart stops.

“Luke… I…”

He hastily presses his finger to my lips to stop me. “No, don’t say anything. I know that you sleep with Gabrial. I know that he fucks you in all the ways that I dream of.” He laughs harshly. “That was made abundantly clear last night even though I already knew.”

His forehead touches mine and he just breathes. My own breathing is just as harsh as we inhale and exhale in perfect tandem. “You have no idea what that was like for me. You don’t know, Hope. It’s torture. I hate him. I hate him for being the one who gets to have you that way.”

My eyes are wide in my face at the raw emotion in Luke’s voice. “I hate him, but I don’t. I can’t hate him even though he’s a goddamned criminal. I can’t hate him because he was my friend. I can’t hate him because I loved him. And most importantly, I can’t hate him because you love him.

“No matter how much I hate him, I can’t really hate him. I love him, too, just like you and I hate that.

“I hate that I’m a cop and he’s a criminal. I hate that we’re at fucking war and you’re in the middle.

“I love you and I want the best for you, but I can’t ask you to choose. I would never ask you to choose between us… because I don’t know who you would choose, Hope.

“I don’t know who you would choose… and that kills me.”

My breath is jerky, and tears are running down my face at his words.

I want to soothe him. I want to reassure him and to tell him that I love him, and I would choose him…

But I can’t do that. I can’t tell him that because I can’t choose.

I love them both… equally and the idea of not having either one of them almost cripples me.

The sad fact is that my heart belongs to them both and I am honestly not certain I can live unless I have them both.

How fucked up is that?

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