Page 8 of Heart Throb

CAMILLA

There’s no fancy overlook. We aren’t in the back of a pickup truck. This isn’t a country song. It’s my life and for once, it’s going great.

Griffin’s body is perfect. I know he jokes about having a dad bod, but I love the way he feels on top of me. I like wrapping my arms around him and feeling like I have someone to hold onto. I like knowing that at any moment if something were to happen, he’d be able to protect me. Griffin seems like the kind of guy who’s packing abs somewhere beneath that layer he calls fat.

He has a set of thick, powerful thighs, too. Not to mention a round ass that’s just begging to be slapped. When he positions himself at my entrance and I reach around to grab something to hang onto, I give him a squeeze.

In the darkness, I almost miss him a wink. “You like that?” He asks with a grin before flexing the muscles in his ass. “It’s my best feature.”

It brings a smile to my face and eases my nerves a little bit. This allows him easier entrance for just a moment and Griffin takes advantage of it. He pushes past the resistant muscles of my opening and I take a sharp breath, adjusting to his size. I’ve never had anything inside of me besides a tampon, so this is quite the change.

“Is everything okay?” He asks, stilling inside of me for just a moment.

I nod my head yes, urging myself to breathe. “Of course,” I tell him. “It’s just a new experience.”

Griffin moves slowly inside of me, back and forth, thrusting his hips to give me pleasure as he sinks deeper into me with each of his movements. I take as much of him as I can. Every inch widens me more. My body feels like it’s coming apart. It hurts and feels good all at the same time.

If I had given myself to some teenage boy like all of my friends, perhaps this would be more fun. We’d be laughing and moaning, going at it like seasoned veterans. I’d have lost it ages ago and he wouldn’t be breaking me in with slow, easy strokes.

But Griffin looks me in the eyes as he fucks me. He doesn’t pump into me a few times, come, and then pull out. He isn’t like the high school boys that my friends dated. He’s a man and he looks at me like he cares about me.

When he finally bottoms out and can’t go any further, Griffin presses his forehead against mine. “Whatever happens after this, know that I have always cared for you, Camilla, and I will go on caring about you until the end of time. You will always have a special place in my heart.”

I don’t know if anyone else tears up during sex, but I do. I don’t wipe them away, but Griffin does with his lips. He kisses away my tears before he starts to move inside of me.

Where there was once pain, there is now only pleasure. Every thrust of his hips leaves me wanting more. I can feel energy building up all over my body. I am electrified by his touch and I want nothing more than to live in this moment forever.

I can’t imagine losing my virginity to anyone else. Under any set of life circumstances, I might have given myself over to someone else. But everything that happened to me in life led to this. It led to my father’s arrest and subsequently Griffin moving in. It led to our friendship. It led to us making love beneath the stars.

I am blinded by passion and pleasure when a second orgasm overtakes me. I think I grab onto Griffin because I feel his skin beneath my hand. We are both slick with sweat and I am lost in a quagmire of sensations.

We lie there in the aftermath listening to the radio. The music slips from song to song as if nothing has changed. The occasional car drives by without stopping. The world keeps on spinning. Everything is the same for people outside the car. For them, the earth hasn’t shattered. In here though, everything is different.

“What now?” Griffin asks after a little while. He slowly pulls his body off of mine.

I sit up and curl my feet under me so he has room to sit down on the other side of the backseat. “I don’t know, Grif. I guess, well, anything. What do you want to happen now?”

He grabs his shirt off the ground and hands it to me. Our clothes are all strewn about, but I doubt we’ll make the effort to put them all back on right. Under the cloak of darkness, as long as our bits are covered, I’m sure we can make it back inside the trailer. “Let’s go home for now,” Griffin decides. “We’ll talk about it in the morning.”

In the morning, I have work. By the time I get home, he’ll be at work. Then I have another shift at the golf course. By the time we get back to this topic, it’ll be this time tomorrow. But I guess I don’t have any other options.

Having sex with Griffin doesn’t change anything, not really. I still need to make money. I still have bills to pay. I still need to save up for the future I so desperately want to make it to. While this might change my relationship with him, it doesn’t change my life. Not really. “Alright. Let’s go home.”

Sometimes good things fall into your lap, but they don’t change your life. Griffin was in the right place at the right time the other day with Tucker. He helped me out of a bad spot and I’m thankful for that. When he decided to stay at the trailer and help me out again, that was great, too. And being here for me these past few weeks as a friend has been nothing short of life-changing. However, it hasn’t changed the fundamentals of my life.

I still need three jobs just to survive and I still don’t know what the next step is for me. It’s all fine and dandy to have someone to confide in, but what’s that mean in the long term? Does it even really mean anything at all?

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