Page 71 of Loyalty (The Salvation Society)

“Yeah, you told us that she’s the love of your life. That you are nothing without her. That you would walk away from the band if that’s what it took.”

This time I do look up and the sadness in his eyes tells me he’s not lying. “Lane.”

“No, don’t. I get it, I do. I know that you would walk away today if it meant you could have her. I also know that you’ll never really do it. You’ll take the misery, the heartache, and the pain. You’ll go back to your drinking and fucking any chick that looks at you. You’ll live a loveless life, because you’ll never leave us. You’ll never let this band fail,” he says, rubbing his hands together.

“You’re right.”

He grins as he slaps my back. “Go get a little more sleep.”

I sigh and head for the bedroom, grateful they let me use the big one. I fall onto the bed and blue eyes haunt me.

I wake up to the sound of music and groan as I roll over. I check my phone and see it’s almost eleven. Damn. I sit up and scrub my face before looking around. How the fuck can things change completely in twenty-four hours? I woke up with her in my arms yesterday and today I have no idea where she is.

I’ve never felt this kind of pain before, and I don’t know how the fuck I’m supposed to get on stage tonight. I don’t even feel like I can breathe without her. How am I going to sing?

“Kegan?”

“Yeah,” I say, climbing off the bed.

The door opens and Remi walks in. I don’t wanna hear him compare what he had with Olivia to what I had with Lorelei. I don’t want to listen to him talk about how he was hurt, and she walked away. I’m not ready to hear that I need to move on.

“Come on. We picked up breakfast and coffee is brewing,” he says, nodding toward the door.

I follow behind, grateful he didn’t say anything. I make myself a cup of strong coffee and sit at the table with them. Everett passes me a breakfast sandwich and I graciously take it.

“How are you feeling?” Lane asks.

I bite into my sandwich and lift my eyes to him. “I’m all better. Drinking myself unconscious made me forget all about her.”

“Oh damn, I missed asshole Kegan,” Everett says.

“Fuck you.”

“You just gonna let her go?” Remi asks.

I laugh as I finish off my sandwich. “You think I should chase someone who promised not to walk away and she all but ran?”

“You told her if she walks out that door you won’t chase her. You told her that if she walks away, you’re done,” Lane says.

“Thanks for the replay.”

“Look, I get you’re pissed, but fucking listen,” Lane hisses.

I lean back and cross my arms, raising my eyebrow.

“You knew if it came out, she was going to get fired. You knew that she would have no choice but to leave. She had no choice, Kegan. Her grandfather and the label made sure of that. Stop acting like she left because you had a fight,” Everett says.

I slam my fists on the table and look at each of them. “She promised not to fucking walk away!”

“And you promised to fix whatever the fuck happens!” Lane yells back. My brows dip and he continues. “She told you she was scared, and you told her that if anyone found out before the end of the tour that you’d fix it. You! But instead of trying, you are blaming her for leaving. She didn’t leave you brother, she got fired as our publicist. You’re letting her walk away. Fucking fight like you always do. Fight for her.”

I stare at him as a weight settles on my shoulders.

“You didn’t fight for her. You fought her,” Remi says.

I scrub my face as realization hits me. Just like the night she was attacked; I wasn’t there to protect her. Only this time it’s worse. This time I was there, I just let her get attacked and attacked her myself.

I close my eyes as regret washes over me. “Fuck,” I whisper.

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