Page 15 of No Strings Christmas

‘Do you?’

‘Yeah.’

I swallow past a lump in my throat, staring at him for a second before moving back to the sofa. I sit down, leaning forward and closing the laptop lid. He comes to join me, taking the seat beside me, just as he had the night before.

I don’t tell him that my eyes had scoured the bar when I’d passed in the hope of seeing him again. I don’t tell him that I had the same yearning for more time with him.

Just a bit more; another fix. Just to get me through the next two weeks.

‘I’m not generally big on the idea of that.’

‘No,’ he agrees, but just stares at me as if to say, so what are we going to do?

‘I’ll go if you want me to,’ he offers after a minute, leaning forward and reaching for my wine glass, taking a sip then handing it to me. It’s a silent, unspoken challenge. If I take the glass I’m agreeing to so much more. I stare at him, then it, before reaching out and wrapping my fingers around the stem. Our eyes hold when I take a sip, and I’m right back where I was last night, the promise and lure of what we share driving all other considerations from my mind.

Knowing that there are bigger forces at play, and seeing that my agreement is a fait accompli, he visibly relaxes, as if the urgency is gone because we both know how this night is going to end. ‘What’ve you been up to?’

‘Tonight?’ I lean back on the sofa and he surprises me by reaching for my legs and scooping them up, putting my feet on his lap. He begins to rub the soles of them, his thumb pressing into the tender flesh there.

‘Let me guess. Family stuff.’ He wiggles his brows in a way that makes me laugh.

‘Are my ears still steaming?’

He holds his thumb and forefinger up, to gesture ‘just a little’.

I sigh heavily. I was circumspect the night before but right now I feel as if I want to vent to someone. ‘It’s my brother-in-law,’ I say carefully. ‘He has a knack for driving me absolutely crazy.’

‘In a bad way?’

‘Is there a good way?’

He stares at me and I smile because of course there is—all the ways he drove me crazy last night.

‘He’s such an arrogant sod. Usually I can just grin and bear it but he’s decided to take an overt interest in my business and believe me when I tell you I need his advice like I need a hole in the head.’

His lips flicker into a smile and then he nods slowly. ‘What kind of advice is he trying to give you?’

‘Well, you know I’m toying with the idea of selling She-Shakes.’

He dips his head in silent agreement.

‘And while I’m gratified by the interest in it, a commercial objective was never really part of my model. Don’t get me wrong, it’s very rewarding, but I’m not someone who wants to perennially create tech start-ups. She-Shakes is my heart—that community exists because of my blood, sweat and tears. It was born out of—,’ I stop for a second, aware I’d been about to veer off the marketing script for the business with a rant about ingrained misogyny and a need to break women free from the shackles of a patriarchal system that serves up benevolent—and malevolent—oppression as a daily meal.

‘I did this because it’s important,’ I say instead, holding the wine glass in my fingertips, running my thumb up the stem thoughtfully. ‘I can see the advantages to selling. But there are disadvantages too. My brother-in-law and father don’t seem to understand that my goal isn’t to make as much money as possible and move on.’

‘And you care what they think?’

The question surprises me.

I jerk my eyes to his, a frown on my face. ‘I wouldn’t have said so.’ I sigh. ‘But maybe I do.’ Then, I shake my head. ‘No, I don’t. It’s just being here and having them go over and over the stock prospects of my “offering”, reducing years and years of my work to commercial viability, it honestly makes me feel sick.’

‘Your dad has made a fortune by taking companies and hyper-refining them to the point where their value when he leaves is considerably higher than when he came on board.’

I bristle a little. ‘Is that admiration I hear in your voice?’

‘I admire anyone who can do that,’ he says frankly.

‘But that’s what you do. Albeit with media corporations but it’s essentially the same thing.’

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