Page 41 of Screwed

I grab some saltines and toss them in my basket. We head down the next aisle and Madelyn keeps reading.

“Maybe it’s strep. Does your throat hurt?” She asks and I shake my head.

“No, I’m just tired and my stomach is upset.”

“Hmm,” she says, going back to searching her phone for my symptoms. “It could be food poisoning. Did you eat anything weird yesterday?”

“No, and it’s been going on for closer to a week or week and a half,” I say, switching the shopping basket to my other arm.

“Hmm,” she says again and I head over to the beauty section to grab some shampoo.

“I think that you’re going to need one of these too,” Madelyn says hesitantly and I look over to see her handing me a pregnancy test.

“What?” I ask, my whole body going cold. “I’m not pregnant.”

“Are you sure? When was your last period?” She whispers and I try to think back.

My periods have always been a little spotty so I’ve been getting the birth control shot for the last few years to help regulate them.

When was my last shot? It was right before the break-in. Wait, did I go to that doctor appointment?

Panic starts to fill me as I realize that I canceled that appointment because I was going to the store to meet with Officer Miles. I never called to reschedule it.

I close my eyes. I want to kick myself. How could I have been so careless?

Am I really late? I guess maybe... but I’ve been so stressed lately. That has to be it. That’s why I haven’t gotten my period yet. I’m not pregnant. It’s just stress.

I repeat that sentence to myself over and over again as I stare at the pregnancy test in Madelyn’s hand. I can’t seem to force myself to take it. I know that she could be right and I should just do the test just to be able to cross that possibility off of the list.

“It’s probably just stress,” I tell her and she nods but she still slips the pregnancy test into my purse.

“Just in case,” she whispers and I swallow hard.

I’m starting to really panic now and I know that I need to get out of here before I start to freak out. I’ll go home and take the pregnancy test to put my mind at ease. Then I can get some rest and hopefully be over whatever virus this is in a day or two.

“I’ll see you later,” I say as I head up to the checkout.

“Sure. Call me if you need anything, okay?”

“Thanks,” I say, giving her a side hug before I dump all of my stuff onto the conveyor belt.

I check out and hurry back to my car. I can feel my heart racing the entire way back to my little cabin and I wonder if I should have taken the test at the market with Madelyn. Maybe having the support would have been better but it’s too late now. I’m already home.

I pull into the driveway and hurry inside. I drop everything by the door and grab the pregnancy test out of my purse and run down the hall to the bathroom.

I was so anxious to get the test over with on the drive home but now that I’m here, I start to hesitate. I flip the box over and over in my hands as I try to think this through.

What if it’s positive? How will I tell Arlo? Will he be happy or upset? Am I even ready for a baby? Oh my god, I could be a mom soon!

I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself down.

I can do this. It’s probably not even positive and I’m just panicking for nothing. Just get this over with so you can take a nap.

I tear open the box and read the instructions. It says that the best time to take the test is first thing in the morning but I can’t wait that long. I can take another one in the morning if I’m not feeling better.

I rip open the packaging and pee on the stick before I set it back on the counter. I set a timer on my phone for three minutes and then I start to pace. There isn’t much room in the bathroom so I really only take three steps one way before I turn and head back.

What other symptoms do I have? My breasts have been a little sore but I just thought that Arlo was a little rough the other night or that maybe I slept on them wrong. They don’t seem bigger, do they?

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