Page 47 of Whiskey Lies

Chase huffs out a breath. “If you can’t even talk about it then we shouldn’t be trying to partner with Landry.” He looks down at his hands. “This is ridiculous. It’s been almost thirty fucking years, guys.”

Carter’s eyes grow as dark as my mood, and I watch him snap. “Shut the fuck up.”

It’s not fair to Chase—I know this—but he also doesn’t know how unfair it is to us.

“Enough,” I say, looking between my two brothers as they stare one another down, both of them breathing tightly.

Chase’s blonde waitress appears at the table with our drinks and a timid smile. No one can miss the tension at this table. It’s as thick as a fog over the bay that we dread returning to. Chase stands and follows her from the table. She looks nervous, but as soon as they are out of earshot, I see that he’s cracking jokes and bringing a smile to her face. It’s amazing how one minute he can be wound tight as a jack-in-the-box and the next he graces people with a goofy smile and a joke. So unlike us. It must be a trait he inherited from his mom.

Turning to Carter, I see that he’s still brooding, not looking after Chase but staring straight into his drink. I didn’t notice he’d ordered a whiskey, and now I wish I had ordered one as well. But unlike him, I have a company to run. “Cut him some slack; he doesn’t have it easy either.”

Carter glares at me. “He doesn’t get to talk about her.”

I turn my head, trying to get through to my brother. “Carter, he doesn’t know better. And he’s right. I have to step up. If not for her then at least for Pa and Grandmother.”

Carter rolls his eyes. “She didn’t care about any of this.”

I shrug my shoulders. “I wouldn’t know. I was two when she died. But the people who raised us, the ones who gave us every opportunity? It matters to them. I’ve made a promise to them. So if you guys think it’s important for me to be seen back at the…” I can’t get myself to say home. It hadn’t ever been my home, or at least I don’t ever remember living there. “Back in Bristol, then that’s what I’ll do. I could use some time in the fresh air anyway.”

Carter sighs. “I can go with you.”

I shake my head. “You don’t have to.”

“But I should.”

I shrug again. “Could be fun.” I smile genuinely. “Maybe we can even get Cat to join us. Make a trip out of it.”

Carter laughs. “Bristol, Rhode Island isn’t exactly a destination, Cash.”

“Tell that to all those people who travel there for the Fourth of July.”

“True. And it would be good to get out in front of this thing. To show Landry we are team players. That we are as invested in that town as he is. Even if it’s not exactly true.”

But it could be. No place has ever felt like home to me. And maybe that’s because I’ve been in the wrong places. Maybe I’m looking for the wrong things, and I just need to start my search back where it all began. Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to visit her grave again. Or maybe it will, but it’s also necessary.

Chapter 18

Grace

This is an incredibly stupid idea.

A naïve, ill-conceived, stupid idea.

Even as these words twist through my mind, my legs keep moving forward. I hate how we keep doing this to one another. How I keep hurting him.

And myself.

I’m just going to clear the air. Make things right and then set us back into our professional space.

Or you’re going to jump him, my inner hussy teases.

It’s the photo. The one from Friday night. I was all set to send the email to Cash, to remove any emotion from the interaction and just forward him the names, when I spotted the photograph Tessa had shown me of Cash and me kissing.

What is wrong with me? Why did I forward it to myself from her phone? I’m a glutton for punishment.

And an idiot. Because now I’m walking into his office, inhaling the woodsy smell that reminds me of Cash, and feeling a buzz like I’ve just sipped straight from a whiskey bottle. That’s what he does to me. He makes me tipsy with emotion.

Breathless, fearless, and stupid.

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