“Why the choice?”
“The group is heading down the night before to set up the campsite. I have some things to take care of at the shop, so I can’t head down until the morning.”
“You. I want to go with you. I don’t even know Greg.”
“He’s Lucy’s… I want to say boyfriend, but I don’t think they’re there yet.” The look he gave her was intimate, possessive, relieved, and it shredded right through her heart. Because he thought theywerethere. Well, they had been…
“No, I want to go with you.”
“You’ll have to wake up early.”
“I know how to wake up early. I just don’t like it. But, I also know you.”
“You know Lucy.”
“Jonah, I want to go with you.”
He smiled; it was the correct answer, she could tell.
They ate their food and drank their beers. Jonah made her drink water as well. Before they headed out, they both made use of the bathroom. Then they mounted up and leisurely rode back to the Plaza.
After stretching out again, she leaned against the Jeep as she watched him secure the bikes. He glanced up occasionally, making note of her regard for him. She didn’t want to let him go; she knew she needed to. She knew what she did to men.
So she was fighting a different sort of inner battle now. She wanted to see how far she could push him, to find his boundaries, his breaking point. But she knew once she saw him broken, he would be useless to her. And she didn’t want him broken.
And she didn’t want to lose him. But it was better for him if she let him go.
A clean break could happen after their trip. It was adefinitestop-dating-Jonah date: after she fulfilled her obligation, she could walk away. It was only a week away. She could weave and dodge for a week.
Straightening, he regarded her with a hint of concern. “Is everything all right?”
“Yeah. Just admiring the view.”
He joked, “It’s safer for me when you’re doing it in front of me, two feet on the ground instead of on wheels behind me, staring at my ass.”
Her jaw dropped open.
“Don’t think I don’t know you were checking me out.”
She stuttered, “Well, this asshole was being a road hog, so… yeah. Nowhere else to look.”
He laughed as he turned toward the driver’s side.
They drove back in comfortable silence. Both were tired; it’d been a good day. He reached across the console and held her hand. She let him. She’d let him do anything, because their time was limited. Was it fair? Probably not. But it made him happy, for now.
She wasn’t going to lie to herself: it made her happy, too. Being with him made her happy. So her mind was already speeding toward the evening ahead: a shared shower, cuddling in front of the television neither one would watch…
In her driveway, though, he only put the Jeep in park. When she looked at him quizzically, he reached out and stroked her cheek. “This was us, Elliott. Today was us. Thank you for today.”
Slipping his hand behind her neck, he brought her toward him. His kiss was gentle, his tongue was soft, searching… Not heated, but…
It was a word she didn’t want to entertain.
Breaking this kiss, he said, “I’ll talk to you later.”
Holy crap, he wasn’t coming inside with her. Again, showing her that restraint she was sorely lacking, the restraint that drove her crazier than his hands roaming over her. Dazed, she nodded. She got it: he was trying to remind them both of how they’d started: the emotion, the feelings, before sex blindsided them.
Fighting. He was fighting.
She loved him for it. She hated him for it.