Page 41 of Collision

I nod tightly and he places the knife on the counter before walking over to me. His hands run down my arms, rubbing in soothing motions as he ducks his head to look at me, and his eyes are an abyss.

“Do you have any painkillers?” I can’t will myself to smile and Josh’s hands move down to my wrists. His eyes drop with them and his lips press into a thin line.

On my right arm there are five are small marks, barely turning from red to purple, but potent enough a mix that I know what shade of foundation I’m going to need to conceal them.

He lifts my arm gently and places soft kisses to the skin as he speaks.

“I really am sorry, Mikaela.” He kisses another bruise. “I don’t know what came over me. I’ve never been like that before. I won’t be like that again.”

“It’s fine.” I lie, to him or to myself I’m not sure, but it’s a lie all the same. “I just have a headache from the drink.”

“Of course,” he soothes. “Aspirin is in the cupboard in the bathroom.”

“Okay.” I nod, turning to leave, but his hands wrap around me before I take a step away.

“Mik?”

“Yes, Josh?” I face him and my heart splinters. His eyes are wide with pain and his lip trembles.

“I really am -”

“Please don’t say sorry again,” I interrupt. “It’s okay.”

This time the lie feels more dangerous. It feels more risky. This time, as he kisses me, I tell myself it’s true; it’s okay, he didn’t hit me. His grip had just been too tight.

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