Page 34 of Love Out Loud

“Where are we going?” he asked, jogging a few steps to catch up.

“Someplace less romantic,” she said. “That was ridiculous.”

He was pleased they were on the same page. “Where?”

“The dog park.”

Yep. That’d do it.

…

Jake was being a remarkably good sport, Fiona decided. He hadn’t argued or even blinked when she’d mentioned the dog park. She opened the gate into the small-dog side and unleashed Otto and Daisy, who immediately charged across the yard to sniff a French bulldog.

She tucked Sir Squash into her backpack side pocket to prevent an encore of the great squash-napping episode of last year. A corgi had made off with the toy when Fiona wasn’t looking, but fortunately, the corgi’s owner retrieved it before there was bloodshed. Otto considered squash-napping a serious crime.

She set her backpack on her usual bench, which was, fortunately, empty. In fact, except for the Frenchie and a pair of dachshunds, they had the small dog park to themselves. The big-dog section behind them, not so much. It wasn’t until she sat down that she realized Jake was standing facing her, face white, staring into the crowded big-dog area. Oh, crap.

Immediately, she stood and drew his attention to her. “Hey, look at me, Jake.”

He did. Her heart squeezed when she recognized that look.

“I’m sorry. I hadn’t thought this through.” She pulled Sir Squash out of her backpack pocket. “Like last night when I was supposed to deliver a speech to a yellow squeaky penis.” She gave the toy a couple of squeaks and relaxed a bit when a little of him returned to his eyes and he tried to smile.

“I’d still like to see that,” he said. She could tell he was fighting the urge to look past her into the yard and whatever was scaring the crap out of him.

“We can go,” she said.

“No. I…” He looked past her, then back to her face. “I’ll be fine.”

“Let’s move to that bench instead.” She pointed to an empty bench on the side of the yard, where he wasn’t facing the big dogs but his back wasn’t to them, either, which she was certain would have made him feel vulnerable.

He nodded and followed her. This was the first time she’d ever seen him in something other than a business suit, she realized. Even in blue jeans and a navy T-shirt, he looked perfectly put together. They sat in silence while Daisy and Otto played a vigorous game of chase with the dachshunds as the Frenchie barked his approval.

“I got hurt by a dog when I was a kid.”

She sat very still. He did, too, except for his right index finger, which tapped rapidly on his thigh.

“It wasn’t an attack or anything. It was an accident. I caused it, really. The dog was just being a dog.”

She could tell by the way he was staring off in the distance, he was reliving it in his memories, so she waited.

After a while, he continued. “We lived in Queens. I had just turned six. I’d been told to stay in our front yard to play. Mom went inside to get something, and the neighbor’s dog had come to the gate right next to our yard. It was a big dog. Probably a Lab… I don’t remember that much about it.”

Fiona suspected he remembered every little detail about it, including the color of the dog’s eyes and what its name was.

He looked over at her. “This is ridiculous. You don’t need to hear this. Nothing really happened to cause me to be nervous around dogs. I mean, I’ve never even mentioned it to anyone because it’s so silly.”

She placed her hand over his and stilled his tapping finger. His muscles loosened at her touch. “Nothing that makes you uneasy or unhappy is silly.”

“You of all people would know that, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes.”

The dachshunds and her cairns reversed directions, zooming counterclockwise now.

“I’d asked Santa for a dog for Christmas for three years running, but he never brought one.” He shook his head. “At least that’s the legend according to my dad.”

She could imagine a four, five, and six-year-old Jake sitting on Santa’s lap, asking for a puppy. “Your parents didn’t want you to have a dog.”

---