Matt
Matt gripped the weathered railing so hard he could almost feel the splinters digging into his palms. Exhaling a breath, he pulled himself to standing. The muscles in his arms strained as they lifted his body weight, and he leaned his torso against the railing until he found his balance. Ignoring the razors slicing through his legs, he closed his eyes and tilted his face toward the sun. It felt good to be upright. The months since his accident had mostly been spent recumbent or seated in his chair. It was a wonder he hadn’t developed pressure sores.
Given how weak and atrophied his legs were, it was hard to believe he’d won Olympic gold. But over the last few weeks, he could sense a difference. A change. A renewed strength. Or perhaps, it was all in his imagination.
“You’re doing so well!”
Day after day, Brie’s encouragement played on repeat in his mind. She’d become his personal cheerleader, spurring him on to do his home exercises when it was the last thing he felt like doing. Until she’d taken over his sessions, he hadn’t had the motivation to do much at home, which had been evident in his lack of progress. Martin had been a good therapist. He knew what he was doing, but there was something about Brie that motivated him and made him desire her approval. Her encouragement. Seeing her smile, and knowing that his efforts were what put it on her heart-shaped face, was the highlight of his week.
“Looking good, Matt.”
The sliding glass door rattled in its tracks and Aunt Helen stepped out onto the deck. Wisps of grey hair framed her face as she appeared beside him clutching a cup of aromatic English Breakfast tea in her hand.
“Thanks.”
“It won’t be long before …”
He held up a hand, leaning his body against the balustrade for support. “Don’t.”
Lowering her head, she sighed. “I’m sorry. I know how much it irks you when people say that. I’m not being flippant or disregarding your situation, you know.”
“I know.” They’d been over it numerous times before. At first, it used to give him hope when people said his recovery wouldn’t take long. But as weeks turned into months, his hope had disappeared like ashes in the wind when he realised his recovery had a limit. Why on earth he thought he’d ever be able to fully recover, let alone walk again, he didn’t know. False hope was cruel.
“I love you, Matt.” Aunt Helen’s sunspot-speckled hand closed over his. “And it breaks my heart to watch you battle your physical limitations and your inner self-talk every day. You know I only want what’s best for you. You still have so much life left to be lived. Don’t give up so soon. God hasn’t given up on you.”
“Then why did this happen?” A volcano of frustration welled in his chest as he tried to contain the edge to his voice. He tightened his grip on the railing. His knuckles turning white. He’d been through this so many times. Endless hours of inactivity had given him all the time in the world to question why his dreams had been snatched away from him. “The God I heard about growing up was a kind and loving God. Not someone who allows things like this to happen. Who takes people’s dreams and crushes them. What did I ever do to Him?” He waved a hand toward the sky. He could think of plenty of other examples where God had allowed bad things to happen to good people. Famine. War. Terminal illness. Poverty. Why? Matt wasn’t a bad person. He gave to charity. He volunteered when he’d been able to. So, why on earth did God allow this to happen? Why not just end his life in the accident? Why did he still have his legs if they couldn’t do what they were supposed to do? It was as though God was playing a cruel joke on him.
“Oh, Matt.” His aunt sighed. “I don’t have all the answers. But I do know this. God loves you. His love is unchanging and is the only certain thing in this world. When all else is taken away, He remains steadfast. Goodness knows where I’d be if it weren’t for Him.”
Matt slid a frown her way, taking in her elegant profile as she gazed toward the ocean. What did she mean by that? He knew she’d faced some trying times in her life. Her inability to have children. The death of her husband. Her battle with breast cancer. But they’d never had a heart-to-heart about those things. She seemed to have just accepted her lot and moved on with her life. Had she been on rock bottom and looking for an out at one time, too? Perhaps there was more to her story than she’d ever let on.
“Well, I’m glad it’s worked out for you.” He wasn’t ready to dwell on all she’d said. God might be all that for her, but he hadn’t seen any evidence of God being good in his own life.
“So, how are your exercises going?” Her gaze scanned his legs. “It is really good to see you standing.”
“Not too bad.” Thankful for the change of topic, a wistful smile played on his lips as his thoughts jumped to his therapist. Hisfemaletherapist, and how she’d sparked something to life inside him.
“You hated going. What’s changed?”
“I’ve got a new therapist.” One that melted him with her smile and captivated his interest with her zest for life, even though he knew he was tormenting himself with daydreams of an impossible outcome.
“Ah.” Aunt Helen lifted her cup to her lips that were tipping into a smile. “Sometimes it takes the right person to make progress. Oh! Come inside, there’s someone I want you to meet.”
“Now?” He loved Aunt Helen dearly, but sometimes her timing was not so great. Did she really expect him to meet a guest, dressed as he was in sweatpants and a well-loved t-shirt he used to wear to training? Then again, why did it matter? He didn’t need to impress anyone.
“I don’t want to keep him waiting.” She looked set to burst out of her skin.
“If this is your pastor, I don’t …”
“It’s not Pastor Jacobs.” She slid the door open, gesturing for Matt to precede her inside.
Well, that was a bonus. He wasn’t ready to spend the afternoon praying. Although, if someone could talk to God for him and find out why He’d destroyed his future, then maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea. But if it wasn’t the pastor, who was it? Why was his aunt buzzing with excitement?
Returning to his chair, he wheeled inside and looked around the empty living room. Was Aunt Helen losing her mind? Had he missed something? Someone’s birthday? His was still a few months away. Surely she hadn’t invited people over. The last thing he wanted was for a bunch of strangers to jump out from behind closed doors and surprise him.
“Here he is.” Aunt Helen bent down behind the sofa and picked up a … pet carrier? What on earth?
A sharp yap filled the room. Matt’s eyes widened as Aunt Helen unhooked the latch, opened the door, and scooped out a ball of white fluff. A pink tongue darted out. A tail wagged vigorously. A … dog?