Page 77 of The Accidental Wife

I sigh rubbing my forehead, “I know Josh, but it's not that easy. On the one hand, I’ve got Shayla who is incredible, and we have so much fun together, and I like her so fucking much. We have such an amazing connection, but she’s the complete opposite of me. How well do we really know each other? We’re constantly butting heads, and I’m worried once the sexual chemistry and attraction wear off, we’ll end up resenting each other.” I explain, twirling the ring on my finger. “And then there’s Sophie, who I’ve been in love with for years, she’s the perfect girl for me in every way. She’s familiar and uncomplicated. She’s the logical choice in every way.” I justify staring at the floor.

“But..” Josh presses.

I sigh, closing my eyes, “She’s not Shayla.”

Josh groans, “Oh my God, Cole, we’re going round and round in circles. Look, if they both stood in front of you right now asking you to make a choice, who would your heart tell you to pick?” Josh asks, sitting forward and picking up his bottle of beer.I mull over his words silently for a while.

“My heart says, Sophie,” I admit with a defeated sigh. “Deep down, it’s always been, Sophie.”

“Well, there you go. I think you’re confusing your attraction and sexual chemistry with Shayla with having actual feelings for her.” Josh says, taking a sip of his beer, and I frown.

“What do you mean? I do have feelings for her, Josh. I’m just not in love with her.”

At least, I don’t think I am.

“Look, what I mean is, Shayla is the ‘meantime girl’ like a rebound— if you will. She’s the girl you have some fun with but never commit to. She’s a good distraction to help you nurse your broken heart.” Josh explains with a shrug, and I stare at him. “And she has helped take your mind off Sophie the last couple of months. You’ve been happier and a lot more pleasant to be around.”

“I don’t know, Josh, this thing with Shay has been an emotional rollercoaster. Besides, she always made it abundantly clear that she would walk away once the agreement was done. I think, no, I know she’s counting down the days till she’ll be free of me and can go back to her own life, where she can be herself again. She told me she feels worthless when she’s with me, and I care about her enough to understand that she doesn’t want to be a part of my lifestyle. It’s simply hard to face the fact that I have to let her go.” I swallow the lump forming in my throat and sigh.“I really like having her in my life.”

“Are you going to talk to Sophie and see if you guys can work things out?” Josh questions leaning back against the sofa.

I nod, “Yeah, I’ll talk to her in the next couple of days. I just need to sort my head out before I go over there and tell her that she’s the one and I’m still in love with her.” I tell him, chugging back the rest of my beer. I pick up the divorce papers from the table and look at them.

“Are you going to sign it?” Josh asks, gesturing to the divorce papers I’m holding. I sigh and stare at Shayla’s signature at the bottom, where she signed it months ago. I nod, picking up the pen and ignoring the pull in my heart and sign the papers and drop them on the table.

There, it’s done.

I hear the front door click shut and sit forward. Josh and I exchange looks. “Was that the front door?” I ask, and Josh shrugs, pursing his lips.

“Sounded like it.”

I get up and walk toward the entryway, thinking Shayla had come home, but no one was around. Maybe Josh forgot to shut it when he came over. I sigh and push aside the disappointment of hoping Shayla was back so I could see her and throw myself back on the sofa with a frustrated groan.

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