Page 110 of The Accidental Wife

I exhale and rub the back of my neck, agitated. “No, it’s not just that, Sophie. I thought we could get back what we once had but we can’t because I realised that what I want has changed. I’ve changed. All the yacht parties, and you and all your fake socialite friends pretending to like one each other, when secretly you’re competing with one another. Who has the best clothing line, who will get married first, who has a bigger engagement ring? It’s shallow and materialistic bullshit, and I’m over it. I want to be able to come home after a long day and relax with my girlfriend— but I can’t do that with you, because you always want to do something, you always want to be somewhere. It’s exhausting. Your whole lifestyle is gruelling to me now.” I clarify openly. I wasn't lying. I was honestly so tired of all of it.

Sophie stares at me for a long moment. She nods and wipes her tears away before she pulls something out of her purse, which was on the bed. “I was going to give you this after we had our dinner as a surprise, but I guess now’s a good time as any.” I take the little card and look at her before I open it and frown. I glance at her and back down at the card again. Oh shit

“Wait. Is this what I think it is?”

“I”m pregnant, Tristan.” I stare down at the picture of a sonogram in my hand, and I feel my heart rate decelerate drastically. I felt like someone had dropped a bucket of hot boiling water over my head.

“How did this happen? I used protection every time we…” I trail off, shaking my head. I used a rubber every fucking time. How could this happen?

“I don't know. I was just as shocked when I found out a week ago, but condoms aren't always a hundred per cent effective.” She says, watching me as I sink on the bed staring at the picture between my trembling fingers. I know it may seem stupid, but at that moment, all I saw was Shayla and her cries of despair. I don’t want to hurt her again. Fuck, this is going to destroy her. “Tristan, please say something.”

“How far along are you?” I ask, my voice barely over a whisper.

“Eleven weeks.” She replies, chewing on her bottom lip. I lean over, placing my forearms on my knees before I hang my head and put my hands ontop. That's around the time we got back together. Fuck!

“Have you told anyone?” I sigh, staring at the floor, praying she hasn't gone, and announced this too.

“No, of course I haven't. I wanted to tell you first.” She states, stepping closer and sitting beside me. “I was so happy when I found out I was carrying your baby. I couldn't wait for you to come back from Dubai so I could tell you. Clearly, I wasn't expecting you to come back and dump me. I thought you would be just as happy as I was about having a baby. Why do you think I wanted to get engaged so fast?” She shrugs her shoulder. “My parents are going to be livid when they find out I got pregnant before we’re married. You know how much their reputation means to them.” She cries, shaking her head. “What am I going to tell them, Tristan?”

I close my eyes and bite the inside of my cheek so hard I drew blood. There's only one thing I can do. I have to marry her, whether I like it or not. She’s carrying my baby, and I won’t turn my back on my child. “You’re not going to tell them anything until we’re married,” I utter numbly as I stare at the floor biting back the tears. “You don't breathe a word to anyone until the time is right, do you understand me?” Sophie nods silently and lays her head on my shoulder. I sigh and get up, massaging my temples, my fingers still trembling. “Go home, Sophie. I need some space.” I throw over my shoulder before I walk into the ensuite bathroom in my bedroom. I stare at myself in the mirror till I hear the front door click shut.

“You fucking idiot!” I growl and smash my fist hard into the mirror a couple of times till it shatters completely, and I couldn't see myself anymore. “Ahh!” I scream at the top of my lungs as I sink to the floor, blood seeping down my hand and onto the tiled floor, crying at the mess my life has become.

In a way, I was relieved Shayla wanted nothing to do with me because it meant I didn't have to tell her about the baby and break her heart all over again. As much as it's killing me to stay away, I have no choice.

I’m getting married in four weeks to a woman I thought I was in love with but now can’t tolerate for shit, and she’s having my baby to boot. Aimee was right. I bring nothing but misery and pain to her life, so she will be much happier without me in it.

That was until she walked into my office ten days later. The moment I saw her, I wanted to fall to my knees in front of her and beg her to hold me so that I could find a moment's peace from the constant ache in my chest. But I couldn't. I deserve to feel this way for everything I put her through. It’s okay, though; I’d much rather take the hit and be miserable for the rest of my life than watch one single tear fall from her beautiful eyes.

I suppose that that's what love really is, and that’s what loving her has taught me, being selfless, or at least I’m trying to be. She makes me a better person.

When I saw her that day, it hit me once again how much I love her. Despite all the shit she’s been through lately, she still had the courage and strength to walk into my office with her head held high and is prepared to work on accomplishing her dream of becoming an architect. That’s why I fucking love her. Divorcing her was the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life.

“Cole?” I blink and look at her watching me with a little frown on her face.

“Hm?”

“Are you okay? You’ve been staring at me without blinking for like a minute straight.” She questions, looking genuinely concerned, and I sigh, closing my eyes. “Somethings wrong, what is it?”

I shake my head. “Nothing. I’m fine.”

“Cole...” She presses with a sigh. “Whatever it is you want to say, just say it. You’ve been trying to tell me something for days. What is it? Just spit it out.”

“There is something I’ve wanted to tell you, but if I’m honest, I’m fucking terrified of your reaction, and I’m afraid to break your heart again,” I admit, and Shayla looks at me warily, sitting forward in her seat.

“What is it, Cole?” I close my eyes and bite my lip hard, trying to find the courage to tell her about the baby.

“That day when you found out about the engagement…” I begin explaining, and Shayla looks at me and nods slowly. “When I got home, Sophie and I got into an argument, and I told her I didn't want to be with her and that it was over between us,” I say and swallow thickly. My voice breaks when I raise my gaze to Shayla, watching me intently while patiently waiting for me to finish explaining.

I exhale slowly. “Sophie's pregnant.”

The glass of water in Shayla's hand slips out of her grasp and hits the floor while she stares at me her green eyes wide.

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