Page 8 of Love Me Again

"Is he okay? Please tell me he's okay?" She cries desperately, and I shake my head weakly.

"I don't know," I whisper, closing my eyes. "He doesn't look good, mum." I cry, holding my hands up, and when shelooks atthe blood on my hands, she weeps. Elaine cups my face in her hands and wipes my tears away.

"He's going to be okay, darling. I believe that with my whole heart, and you need to as well." I close my eyes and nod. She places her hand on my stomach. "He won't leave you both, not when he loves you so much." She consoles me, and I whimper.

"Oh God, I'm so scared. I don't want to lose him."

"Hey, look at me. We're not going to lose him." She tells me sternly, and I nod. I had no other choice but to hold onto those words, but inside I was dying, and no amount of words or assurance could stop the torment in my chest.

* * *

Hours wentby with no word from anyone. My mother and brother came too as soon as Jo called him. Josh was pacing up and down the corridor anxiously while Sam leaned against the wall staring at the floor. My mother was comforting my mother-in-law, and I just sat there staring at my hands. "Shayla, let's go wash your hands and splash some water in your face," Jo suggests, and I shake my head numbly.

"Can we get you anything?" Aimee offers, and I sigh, closing my eyes. An endless stream of tears just kept rolling down my face.

"No." I untangle myself from the girls and stand up. My bladder was so full it was starting to hurt.

"Shayla, where are you going?" My motherquestions and I tell her I have to use the bathroom, and she gestures to the girls to follow me. I stop outside the toilet and turn to face Aimee and Jo.

"Girls, give me a minute. Please?" I plead, and they nod in response. I needed to be alone for a bit. I walk into the bathroom and stroll into a stall. I close the lid of the toilet and sit on it.

I cover my mouth with my hand to smother the whimper that escapes me. I sat there sobbing for a while, just rocking back and forth. "God, please, please, I'm begging you don't take him from me too." I pray, laying my hand on my chest. "Please give him back to us, don't let my daughter grow up without her father like I did please, please, I'm begging you," I beg forlornly. "Don't make us live without him." I place my hands on my stomach and close my eyes. "Pray for your Daddy angel," I whisper distraughtly.

After hours of surgery, the doctor comes out. I lift my head off Sam's chest, who was holding me, and jump up when he walks over to us. "Mrs Hoult?" Both his mother and I answer simultaneously, and the doctor looks at us both, taking off his surgical mask. "His wife?"

"That's me," I whisper, stepping over to him. "How is he? Is he going to be okay?" I question in a flurry, and he sighs, looking at me sullenly.

"Mrs Hoult, your husband is very fortunate to be alive, given the state he was in when he was brought in. He has eight broken ribs, a ruptured kidney, and a punctured lung. On top of all of that, he took a hard hit on the head and fractured his skull." He explains, and I choke on a sob. "It's truly a miracle that he's held on this long."

"Oh, my God."

"Doctor, what does that mean? Is my son going to be okay?" Coles fatherqueries, wrapping his arms around his sobbing wife.

"We can't say for sure at this point. He's fighting to stay alive, but with the injuries he's sustained, it would be a miracle if he made it through the night. We've done all we can for him medically. We'll continue to monitor him closely, though the next twenty-four hours are critical." He explains and looks at me. "He's a strong lad, and he's putting up a hell of a fight in there."

"Can I see him?" I ask, and he sighs. "Please, just for a second?" I sob, and he nods.

"Okay, but only for a second." He agrees and gestures for me to follow him.

"Shayla?" I turn and look at his mother; she looks at me pleadingly. "Tell him I love him." I nod and turn to follow the doctor into the O.R, where they gave me gowns and masks and helped me disinfect my hands before they led me in the ICU ward to see him.

I hear machines beeping as soon as I enter the room, and my heart begins racing. I stop by the door and release a tremulous breath. The doctor stops and looks at me. "Come on, sweetheart, it's okay, don't be afraid." He assures me with a nod of his head. I nod and creepingly walk into the room. I intake a sharp breath when I see him.

"Oh, God." I pant, holding my chest. Tears blur my vision and roll down my cheeks when I see the state of my husband--my Cole. "Oh,... God." I couldn't catch my breath. He didn't even look like himself.

Cole's head was bandaged up, face and eyes bruised and swollen. His once smooth and tan body was covered in cuts and bruises. They had him hooked up to ventilators. I.V drips on the one hand and a blood transfusion on the other. I whimper and shake my head, turning away from him. I couldn't bear to see him in that state. The doctor takes hold of my shoulders and looks down at me.

"Sweetheart, he's pretty beaten up, but he needs you now more than ever." He tells me reassuringly. I nod and turn to look at Cole again. My heart hurt to see him like this. I force myself to step closer to him, and I take his bruised hand in my trembling one.

"Hi baby," I mutter quietly, brushing my thumb gently over his knuckles. "I don't know if you can hear me, but I'm right here with you. Please, baby, keep fighting and come back to me. Come back to our baby girl who needs you." I weep, kissing his knuckles. "I'm going to be right here with you until you open those gorgeous green eyes and look at me again. We're all waiting for you to pull through this baby. You promised me you would come back, so I'm holding you to that promise." I tell him and kiss his hand again. I lean close to his ear and whisper. "I love you, love of my life."

"Shayla," I look back at the doctor, and he nods, informing me it's time to go. I look back at Cole and bite my lip.

"Your mum said she loves you very much," I tell him and place his hand back down carefully. "I'll be right outside, baby," I whisper and kiss my fingers and press them over his heart. I back away falteringly, my eyes never leaving him until the doctor guides me out of the room. The door closes, and I press myself against it, my face pressed to the glass looking at him. "Please, baby, don't give up. Fight for me," I breathe, closing my eyes, tears flowing down my face.

Once I take the gown and masks off, I walk out of the ICU back to where everyone was waiting. They all get up to their feet when they see me standing there, staring ahead with vacant eyes. I couldn't get the state of Cole out of my mind--that image would haunt me forever. Aimee and Jo come over to me, wrap their arms around me and walk me to the chairs. "Sit down, babe," Jo directs me down into the seat.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" My mother asks, kneeling in front of me and cupping my face in her hands. "Shayla?" She shakes me, and I look at her.

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