Page 95 of Cuffed By Love

I lay in bed,unable to sleep. My mind just wouldn’t shut off. The wheels just kept turning and turning. It’s been three days, no word from Levi or Mira. Levi hasn’t come home, and Mira hasn’t been to work. When I asked, Uncle Noah said she’s taken a few days off to ‘recharge’. No doubt our argument the other day caused this sudden recharge requirement. I called and text Levi, but his phone is out of service.

Where the fuck are they? They’re obviously together. Shacked up someplace humping like two wild bunnies. I look over at Megan, asleep beside me. I push the covers off and get out of bed quietly to not wake her. I grab my phone and walk out of the bedroom. I fire up Instagram, and the first thing that pops up is a post by Levi. It’s a selfie of him on his Ducati with Mira sitting behind him, smiling toothily, her hands holding his shoulders. I read the caption, and my heart sinks, ‘The sun rises better with you’.

I almost hurl my phone across the room. Just friends, my fucking left nut. I’m trying not to let it bother me, but Jesus Christ, it’s eating me up. I’ve not seen her in days, and I miss her. I’ve been waiting to apologise to her for what I said, but she’s not been around. Each day I go into the office hoping to see her, but she’s not there, and each day my heart sinks a little deeper into that deep dark pool of disappointment.

I should be focusing on spending time with Megan, which I have been doing. We’ve been going out to dinners, musicals, endless amount of shopping trips, but I’m not a hundred percent with her. How can I be when my mind is currently flooded with Mira?

The next day I walk into the office, tired, distracted, unable to focus. I’m sat at my desk listening to Mark go through my schedule for the day. Absentmindedly, I twirl the fountain pen between my fingers.

“I’ve scheduled a fifteen-minute catch up with you and Mira at one o’clock now she’s back.” My eyes snap up at the mention of her name.

“She’s back?” I intone sitting up a little straighter. Mark nods slowly and watches me shoot up from my seat.

“Wait, there’s still more…” He utters bewildered, his eyes following me toward the door.

“Later.” I throw back over my shoulder. I breeze through the office toward Mira’s office, nodding good morning to the staff that greets me along the way. Molly looks up from her computer and winces, visibly juddering in her seat when she sees me. No doubt she overheard our fight the other day. “Is she alone?” I ask her, pointing to the door and Molly nods, pushing her glasses up her nose. “Be a gem and get us two coffees, please,” I say with emphasis. She catches on to my silent request and vamooses out of sight. I exhale before I push the door open and walk into the office.

Mira looks up from her computer. Her fingers that were flying over the keyboard halt when she sees me standing there. The icy glare she fixes me with slices right through me. “Can I help you with something?” She utters coldly, lowering her gaze to the computer and carries on typing as if I’m not there.

“Do you have a moment?” I ask, walking over to her desk.

“I’ve already approved the meeting your assistant booked in for this afternoon. I’d appreciate it if you’d wait till then to say whatever it is you have to say.” Mira expresses frostily, not even bothering to look at me.

“Mira…” I close my eyes and sigh tiredly. “Can we please just talk?”

“No, Devin. Unless it’s regarding work, there is nothing to talk about.” She retorts cuttingly. I can feel my agitation growing, so I move over to her desk and push the laptop screen shut rather forcefully. Mira’s angry gaze lifts to mine, and she glowers at me. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“I’m trying to talk to you!”

“About what?” She snaps back hotly. “What more could you possibly have to say to me?”

“I came here to apologise to you, Mira.”

“Four days later? It’s a little redundant now, don’t you think?” Mira grouses, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back in her chair.

“Hard to apologise when you’ve not exactly been around.” I throw back snidely, placing my hand down on her desk and leaning closer.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realise I had to sit around and wait for you to pull your head out of your arse long enough to figure out you needed to apologise.” She declares vehemently. I walk around her desk, and Mira watches me as I approach. I grab the back of her chair and spin her so she could face me. I lean down till I’m at eye level with her. Our eyes lock, and the heat exuding in those amber eyes ignites a roaring fire in my very soul.

“Excuse me for needing time to process. Look, I was wrong about what I said to you, and I regret it deeply. I didn’t mean it, Mira. I was angry and frustrated, and the words just flew out of my mouth before I could catch them.” I affirm earnestly. Mira stares up at me, her gaze softening but still displeased.

“You still said it, Devin, which means deep down, it's really how you feel. The truth comes out in moments of anger, and you didn’t hesitate, not for a second.” Her wounded tone fractures something inside me.

“Mira, I promise you I didn’t mean it.” I admit and bite down on my lower lip, “The idea of you and Levi just bothers me more than I like to admit.” Mira opens her mouth to speak, but I stop her. “I know, all right, I know I have no right, and you can spend your time with whomever you choose to, but it vexes me; it always has I can’t help it.” I swallow hard and stroke my thumb over her jaw. “I know I can’t have you, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting you. I’m aware that you’ll never be mine, but I don’t want you to be anyone else’s either. It’s fucked up and selfish, but it is what it is.” Mira’s bottom lip quivers, and her breathing slows while we stare longingly at one another.

“What you said that day about only ever being a fuck to me, you’re wrong. That’s the farthest from the truth because you were my everything Mira, you were then, and you still are now.”

Mira’s eyes glisten, and she swallows thickly, her eyes searching mine. “Devin, you can’t say things like that to me.”

“I have to because you need to know the truth. You need to know what I’ve been keeping buried inside. I—” The ringing of Mira’s intercom interrupts us. I close my eyes and sigh dejectedly.

“Mira, your ten o’clock is here.” Molly’s voice comes from the speaker.

“I have to go,” Mira whispers, lowering her gaze. When I make no move to let her go, she looks up at me again. “Dev, we’ve already tested and pushed the boundaries of our friendship as it is. We’ve still got to work together, so let’s just leave it, okay?”

“Just like that? You can blow past and ignore everything I just said to you?” I demand.

Mira blinks up at me. “What do you want me to do with it? What did you expect would happen, Devin? You’ve got a girlfriend. You’re in a relationship.”

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