And yet, Anna couldn’t deny the comfortable routines they’d gotten into. Each morning, her, Liam, and Rachel slipped inside the nearby towns, scouting out the compound and slowly solidifying their plan of attack. While they did that, Hayden trained with anyone interested in learning, since most of their small group had very little hand-to-hand experience. By the time she returned from her scouting missions, she’d find a tired, sweaty Hayden, whose smile grew just for her. He insisted on working on his devices, moving to a tent they’d set up to protect the equipment from snow and rain in the event it fell. Sometimes, she watched him work. Most times, she talked with the others, trying to learn and strategize.
And each night, she fell asleep in his arms.
It felt wrong. Anna was never destined for calm, for happiness, for companionship. And yet here she was, feeling safe with a man who certainly seemed to care a whole lot for her. A man she somehow found herself trusting wholeheartedly, against all her better judgement.
She’d thought she healed a long, long time ago from the things that were done to her. Betrayal, assault, sterilization, manipulation… they’d molded her into the person she was. Her rage, her yearning for revenge, her drive to be the best and make them all pay for what they’d created. But here, spending time with Hayden and now the others, she realized that her walls, her rage, her hatred and distrust? They were blood, pouring from an open wound she never quite managed to cauterize.
She still wanted her revenge, don’t get her wrong. But suddenly, it didn’t matter if they took extra time to make it happen. She didn’t care that Hayden insisted on what felt like endless training and scouting. It wasn’t bothersome at all to spend so many nights relaxing under the stars, and when she closed her eyes for sleep? Thoughts of a very dead Joseph Greene did not lull her to sleep. Instead, it was Hayden’s strong presence, his warm arms around her, his hard body against her own. Revenge still mattered, a lot, but it was no longer the only thing that mattered.
They still hadn’t spoken about that night she woke up from her… dream. He didn’t bring it up, and she didn’t either.
Yet she could think of nothing else.
She ached for his hands on her again, his mouth, his everything.
It honestly pissed her off that he hadn’t done anything else besides cuddle. Hadn’t made another move, hadn’t brought up what they’d done, hadn’t even tossed a flirty comment her way like he’d done on the road.
She’d been absolutely delightful around him, no animosity at all, and this was her reward? Something would have to be done about that.
? ♥ ?
Hayden retired to his devices after a full day of combat training, lighting a candle and doing his best to work with nothing but the light being cast off by the small flame. Try as he might, his mind wouldn’t focus.
A scratching at the tent’s exterior was a welcomed distraction.
“Come in,” he called without bothering to check who was outside. He’d assumed it was Anna, who sometimes sat with him while he worked, asking questions about the different devices he worked on, or possibly Mason, checking in on the progress of a radio they found, which he still hadn’t been able to get running.
Instead, it was Austin’s form that came through the tent’s entrance, closing it behind him and moving to sit across from Hayden at the chair Anna often occupied.
“Busy?” he asked, despite the fact he’d already sat down and made himself comfortable.
Yes. Hayden was extremely busy… he had plans to make for tomorrow’s training, a radio that needed fixing so they could determine whether it was useful or dangerous, his flyer that had a broken wing that needed dealt with, and, perhaps most pressing of all, the issue of what the hell was going on between him and Anna.
He shrugged. “I can talk.”
Austin’s mouth spread into a wide grin. He lifted a small metal flask to his lips, throwing his head back and taking a swig. “How’ve you been, old friend?”
Hayden’s gaze drifted back down to the devices before him. The flyer wing was a mechanical fix. No deep thought required, no wiring or soldering, just slow and steady reworking of the wing parts with his fingers. That, he could do.
“Well. Yourself?” He moved his hands over the bent plastic, careful to move slowly, bending small bits at a time so as to not snap anything.
“Can’t complain.” Austin threw back another swig.
Hayden could feel his eyes on him as he worked, but he ignored it. Not known for being much of a conversationalist, Hayden was very used to others watching him in silence, not quite knowing what to say or how to say it.
“You’re different,” he finally said.
That made Hayden falter in his work. He lifted his head, meeting Austin’s gaze. “Different how?”
The man rolled a shoulder back. “I used to think you were a robot or something. Not entirely human, ya know?” He chuckled, but Hayden did not do the same. An uneasy feeling spread through his gut. “Now, it’s almost like you’re any other guy, twisted up over a girl.”
And just like that, Hayden’s stomach flipped. “Oh?”
Austin laughed again, clearly not recognizing how uncomfortable Hayden was. And he shouldn’t recognize it; Hayden was fantastic at guarding his own thoughts and feelings from others. Or… maybe not? Austin seemed to know far more than he should have. Did the others know, too?
“Talk to me about it,” Austin offered. “Come on. Get it out.”
Hayden’s jaw tensed.