Page 92 of Falling for the Rockstar

“Okay, boss,” I say when I walk toward his office door.

“Don’t call me that,” he chimes back.

I guess Carter Jackson has rubbed off on me. I smile inwardly and go to my car where I sit and think about what I will do. Who am I kidding? My heart and body aches for him and he’s shut me out. I want to call him, but I know he will just reject me, and I can’t go through that again. I suck up my emotions and pull it together. A picture of us falls down from my visor as I flip it down so I can use the mirror to clean my face.

“I can’t believe he took this of me while I was sleeping on his chest,” I laugh. It’s comical, my hair is everywhere, mouth open, and my t-shirt is covered in paint. Not a flattering look for sure, but he looks happy. And I took that from him.

“Fuck!” I pound on my steering wheel and let out the frustrations I have with myself. Replaying Carter’s conversation in my mind makes me realize how fucked up I could’ve made things. I know I can’t apologize enough, but I know what I can do.

* * *

“I’m sorry, Lenny, I just can’t stay on any longer.” I try to hand him back the check he offered me as an attempt to keep me on his team.

He means well, seeing how my decision to leave came out of nowhere, but I can’t go on as if nothing has changed. Everything has changed. I keep thinking if Simon and I hadn’t become so close, or shared that first kiss, or even made love the first time, none of this would be happening. But we did and it is. I’ve cried myself to sleep every night over the past three. I didn’t have this much emotion when Cornelius and I split. Sure, I mourned the loss of a relationship that had long been on life support, but Simon helped me to recover.

“Be honest with me Myka, is it Simon and his sudden change?”

I figure now’s a good time to tell him the truth. “Actually, it is, but not what you see in the news.” I inhale and hold my breath before letting out a painful sigh. “Simon and I had been dating for a while. It started on that press junket and when we came back, we acted on what we knew was inevitable.”

He sits on the edge of the conference table, his mouth agape slightly and surprise in his eyes. “I-I didn’t know. You two were getting along so well from the start, minus the occasional flirtation he would pass your way.”

“Didn’t you notice the flirting stopped?” I ask.

“Not really. I guess I was too involved with other things to even notice. It's what Simon does so—”

“I understand. But after the last meeting, he called it off. He even tried to fire me. So, I’ve kept my distance. Even blocked him on my phone. When Andy called me last night, I had no choice but to go help, after all it is my job. He was still cold and callous, and I just don’t think we can work side by side as if nothing happened. Sorry.”

Lenny stands and hugs me for a moment. The kind of hug a father would give his daughter after her first heartbreak.

“I get it. I’ll have a talk with him but not to bring you back or scold him. Just a talk. I may even call his parents for the scolding.”

“No, don't do that. He had, rather, has every right to be upset with me. I should’ve discussed it with him and not spring it on him. I was acting on impulse, and I did put business first. That was so stupid of me.” I allow the tears to roll down my cheek and onto my shirt.

Lenny comforts me once again. “Myka, Simon is a complicated, yet gifted, and talented man. I bet he’s thought about his actions and feels really bad.”

“Simon has obviously moved on, Lenny. I was foolish to think he would be a one-woman man. Especially knowing who he was when I first started working with him.” I wipe my tear stains off my face onto a Kleenex and get myself back together.

“I do have other clients we are developing. Maybe you can work with them.”

I smile as he tries one more time to entice me to stay. I grab my meeting notes and folder and start toward the door. “Lenny, the tour starts in two days. Make sure that they work with Brianna on their wardrobe. The T-shirt team should have those items ready by today and they have another photoshoot tomorrow.”

“Any other words of encouragement?”

“I’ll stop and see the show just to say goodbye.”

“I’m sure the guys will appreciate it.”

“Bye, Lenny.” I turn on my heels and walk away from Meteor records for the last time.

When I enter the parking garage, Sebastian is standing by my car. The last thing I need is to have a conversation about his brother.

“Hi, Mr. Ashton. What can I help you with?”

“Mr. Ashton? Come on, Myka. We are still friends, right?”

I don’t hold him responsible, nor will I allow my feelings to break what he and I have developed. “You’re right. I’m sorry. How are you, Sebastian?”

“To be honest, I'm a little nervous about the tour. It’s almost like the first time, but much worse. You kind of set the bar high for us. We only hope we can deliver.”

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