Page 67 of Since Always

"I'm sure that meant the world to her."

We fall into easy conversation, and I had forgotten how much Carl reminds me of Jack. It's bittersweet to look at him now; both nice to feel close to Jack again, and devastating that it's not close enough. Carl and I have slipped into a friendly debate about the minimum wage when Cass approaches behind me.

"Hey, when did you get here?"

I turn around and see her for the first time, my breath catching. She has on a short, tight black dress that shows a lot of her leg and too much of her cleavage. Upon it sits a beautiful blue sapphire, which I have to pull my eyes from. Although she is smiling when I reach her gaze, it doesn't quite reach her eyes.

I had worried about coming tonight. In fact, there was a moment when I almost didn't get into the car at all. But I knew that if I missed this, I would be making some greater declaration. I would be saying to her that all of my big talk about how we would remain close friends was complete bullshit and I would never be able to undo that.

Now seeing her, though, I realize how off-kilter I feel. Have I made a mistake? And was the mistake in coming tonight, or was it leaving her in the first place?

"Hey, yeah. You look amazing. Happy birthday." I wrap her in a hug, but we both try to keep it as casual as possible, knowing the eyes of her family upon us. It's hard, though, feeling the warmth of her skin, the softness of her body as she molds into mine.

I pull back a little too quickly, and her eyes meet mine for a split second.

"Cassidy, sweetheart," Betty says, standing up behind us. "I think your grandad and I are going to go."

"Oh, are you sure? You don't have to."

"Yes. You kids have fun. We wanted to make sure we were here for your big day. We're so proud of you, our little Chickadee," her grandma says, and takes her into her arms. They say goodnight to everyone else, and Jessica excuses herself to escort them to the lobby.

"Chris," Cassidy says, turning toward her brother after they leave. "Come dance with me."

"That's going to be a no from me," he says, and Stephanie smacks him on the shoulder.

"Come on. I'll get them to play something fun. Steph, you too."

"No, you guys go. Chris, go dance with your sister," Stephanie urges, pushing him up. He stands up and follows Cass reluctantly.

"You're next, Blaze," she says, flashing me a broad smile.

Great.

I take a seat next to Stephanie on the couch, greeting everyone else in the group.

"How are you doing?" she asks when everyone seems occupied in other conversations. "Being here tonight, I mean."

I shrug. "I guess we'll see."

She nods. We say nothing else about it; I don't want to take that chance here.

Jessica comes back and sits across from us. "So, Owen, I haven't seen you since New Year's. How is everything in DC?"

"Good. Stressful, but good."

"Nice." Her voice is flat, and she stares at me for just a beat too long before grabbing her wine glass and turning to the friend next to her.

I shoot Steph a questioning glance and she shrugs and mouths, "No idea." At least I know I wasn't imagining it. That was weird.

Cass and Chris come back a few minutes later. He has his arm wrapped around her shoulder and they are laughing.

"You look good dancing, Chris," Stephanie laughs.

"Wow," Cass says with a grin. "She does love you."

He playfully shoves his sister aside. "She just knows the moves when she sees them."

Cass groans. "Gross. Owen, come on. Let's show him how it's done."

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