Page 37 of Concerted Chaos

“I’m sure that was because he expected you to do the right thing, Cassidy.” Xander sounds annoyed now. “Come on, you know how close Jace and I were. What better way to memorialize him than to let one of his brothers sing his songs?”

“Oh, you were brothers?” Tanner interrupts. “I don’t really follow former teen pop stars, so I didn’t realize you were related. I’m so sorry for your loss.” I want to high five him right now. His words visibly cut Xander deeply.

“We were close like brothers.” Xander glares daggers at Tanner, and they are now sworn enemies. Xander will definitely recognize him on their next encounter. “It would give me such joy to be able to give voice to his words.” That’s a great line. He probably came up with that days ago and has been saving it for this moment. But I would never give Jace’s music to Xander, for one simple reason: I don’t like him.

“This is not up for discussion,” I inform Xander, glad that we finished the dessert course and can escape now. All of my enjoyment of this fine food has been ruined by the company.

On the way out—after finding the waiter and slipping him an exorbitant cash tip as an apology for having to deal with our dining companion—I take Tanner’s hand. If we’re going to claim to be in a relationship, we need to make it appear realistic.

When we reach the parking lot though, he looks down at our clasped hands and drops mine aggressively. “Fun game for you, Cass?” he snarls.

“What? Putting up with Xander?”

“No, this bullshit with pretending you like me.”

That’s quite an assumption. I’m fairly sure I only claimed to be dating him, I said nothing about liking him.

“Excuse me? I told Xander I had a boyfriend. You chose to jump in and pretend to be him.”

“What was I supposed to do?”

“I don’t know, nod and smile? I could have been referring to someone else.” Truthfully, I had hoped he’d jump in on the act, but he didn’t have to. He could have said he met my boyfriend before or merely confirmed said boyfriend’s existence. There are lots of ways to lie to Xander.

“Cass ... I don’t get you. You use people. You used me in there.”

“I did not ... oh, no. He just came out the door. He can see us. We can’t look like we’re fighting.” I don’t want Xander to get the idea that my fictional relationship has a crack.

“Fine.” Tanner puts his palms on the sides of my face, pulls me closer, and kisses me.

Tanner kisses me.

He does, he seriously, deeply kisses me.

And I totally melt.

I’ve been celibate for an awfully long time. I have battery operated boyfriends, of course, but they do not kiss. They do not have warm hands and tongues and a firm body to press up against.

The kiss lasts maybe thirty seconds. When he releases me, my knees are weak and my head is spinning. I stare at him, trying to catch my breath and wishing we’d driven his van rather than my backseat-less vehicle. I check over his shoulder.

“I think he’s gone.” Maybe we can move on to a more intimate location.

“And that’s what matters, isn’t it?” Is that contempt in Tanner’s voice? “I hope that worked. I hope we made him sufficiently jealous.”

“I don’t want to make him jealous,” I correct. That was never my goal. “I want to make him leave me alone.”

“Right. Rich, successful superstar, and you want him to go away? You’d rather slum it with someone like me?”

At the moment, that is very much what I want. My fingers, of their own accord, start to reach for him, but I hold them back. This is Tanner. I can’t let myself get involved with a paparazzo, no matter how skilled he is at kissing. What is wrong with me?

“I’m sorry,” is all I can say. Sorry I can’t actually throw caution to the wind and jump into his arms and wrap my legs around his waist and ... yeah, none of that. This was a mistake. A huge mistake.

“You’re a user, Cassidy. I’m not going to keep doing this.”

Doing what, exactly?I want to ask, but he walks away. I guess he forgot I drove us here. Fine. He can walk off his pouty attitude. I don’t know what his problem is anyway. He’s the one who kissed me, not the other way around. If anything, he’s the user.

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