Page 35 of Crush (Deadly Hearts 1)

ChapterTwenty

Ruby

After an hour, I stretch and lose focus. Even after the best night’s sleep I’ve had in a while, I feel tired and unable to concentrate anymore. My phone beeps for a message in my handbag, but I ignore it as I stand up and stride across the office, dragging the door open. Declan and David are still MIA, so I’m assuming they are downstairs. I head down the corridor to the secret door and slide it open, making sure to shut it behind me. Despite my exhaustion, I have to be here tonight. It’s been two nights running that I’ve not made an appearance and it will only give those who want to force me out, a reason to try. Taking the steps quickly, I pause when I see Declan, David and Layton sitting at the bar, sharing a drink and laughing like old pals.

It surprises me that Declan knows how to laugh. His whole life is filled with darkness and death. I suppose that means he is good at compartmentalizing. Splitting his work from his normal life.

“Hey,” David says, waving me over.

I smile and approach them warily. I feel like I’m intruding but the other two men smile and beckon me to come closer.

“Did you know that Irish over here has a Christmas jumper that his mum knitted him, and he wears it every Christmas when he goes back home?” David says.

I look over at the darkly gorgeous assassin and snort laugh. “Really?”

“True story,” he says and takes the shot that David hands him.

“And…that tall, devastatingly handsome and pretty brooding, despite his sleek black Merc, also rides a moped?”

I press my lips together, a gleam in my eye as I try not to laugh at the thought of his huge frame on a tiny moped. “Do you go to Brighton a lot?” I snicker, losing the battle.

“As a matter of fact, yes,” Layton growls at me and also takes the shot David hands him.

“What about you?” I ask David. “Seems you’ve managed to get secrets out of these two. What’s yours?”

His hazel eyes meet mine and search them heavily, almost causing me to shy away before he says, “No secrets. I am an open book. It’s part of my charm.”

“Well, no doubt you have that in spades,” I murmur, dropping my gaze first, which is totally out of character for me. What the hell?

“And you, Miss Ruby?” he drawls in a bad Southern states of America accent. “What secrets do you hold? In fact, one in particular, I’m madly curious about.”

“Yeah?” I ask, folding my arms across my chest. “What’s that then?”

“How did you get the name the Black Widow?” he asks.

It’s like a bullet to my heart. It comes out of nowhere.

I stumble back, tightening my arms in a defense that is useless against the onslaught of memories that flood through me, flashbacks that I can’t unsee, trauma that haunts me but that I push away with the darkness that lives inside me. I suppress it most days. I hardly think about it anymore, but the suddenness of David’s question...I wasn’t ready for it. It caught me unawares and my defenses were down.

“Ruby?” he asks, but his voice sounds really far away.

“Ruby,” Declan’s soft, lilting voice cuts through the pain. “You don’t have to answer that.”

I shake my head and back away, falling back into that day as if it was happening all over again.

Eighteen years old and my first boyfriend. I’d been holding onto my virginity until the time felt right. We’d been together for six months, but I still wasn’t sure. He was.

One day at my home in New York when my parents and sister were out, he decides that if I’m not giving it up, he is taking it.

I struggle.

I fight.

But I’m too weak.

He slaps me hard, and I stumble back into the counter. He punches me in the face and grabs me. He turns me around and shoves my face into the counter, bruising my cheek. He shoves my skirt up and drags my panties down.

I fight.

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